A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have been dating my boyfriend for 8 months now but i am having trouble with my him. i love him a lot but he does not trust me the way i would like to or the way a boyfriend should trust his girlfriend. Recently we had an argument because he checked my phone and there was two phone numbers of two guys that i use to talk to (as friends). He had checked my phone in the past and he said he had not seen those numbers but they where there when he did. I have stopped talking to every guy i use to talk to even if it was just as friends. He now thinks that i am taking or even cheating on him. When i would never do that. It is hurting me that he does not believe me when i am telling him the truth. But in the past when we first started going out i lied to him and did not start of with a good impression and now he says that he can not trust me because he is thinks that i am going to lie again like i did at the beginning. But i have changed and i want things to be good with him. i really do not know what to do now. i love him i would do anything to see him happy and anything for him to trust me. Someone please help me... What can i do so he can trust me and not think wrong things. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, r3cov3ringbutt3rfly  +, writes (11 June 2010):
 This will never get better...He has his own issues that aren't your problem and aren't your fault. He needs to go talk with someone to sort out why he has these problems.If you have never given him reason to mistrust you, are honest with him, and have tried to talk to him about this before, then you've done everything you can and it's time to move on. Tell him that if he wants to be with you, he needs to take care of himself and his problems FIRST.This will just get worse for you as time goes on and possibly turn into an abusive relationship... So the answer to your question is simply, you can't. He has to learn to trust you and others on his own.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2010): Start being paranoid about him, check his phone all the time, pik on his behaviour around girls. See how he likes that!Also, I don't think you can ever make someone trust, they just have to be able to natrually
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A
female
reader, Honeygirl  +, writes (11 June 2010):
 Sorry hun, but I dont think this guy will ever trust you, or for that matter, probably any gf he will have.
Sounds like he has trust issues and self esteem issues.
It also seems that he will continue to get you to cut yourself off from all your friends, this is not healthy. Talk to this guy and be open and honest with him about everything since you have nothing to hide.
If he still persists.... well sorry to say... time to move on. Things wont get better, only worse.
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