A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Hi agony aunts and uncles,(I posted a similar question recently, but am hoping for some clearer advice having added in some major points) A bit confused as I am in a difficult situation, I really like this guy (he’s kinda my best mate). but after some remarks he has made, I wonder whether he sees us as friends, friends with benefits (fwb) or as a proper couple. At our old school (still live within walking distance) our fellow peers would tell me how much we suited each other and should date etc. but I didn’t know whether the feeling was mutual. Since I have left the school, he has become increasingly flirty asking how far I’d go with him and telling me he’d do anything I wanted. He also makes little remarks about how he wishes we were together, but I don’t know whether he means this as fwb’s (minor) or as a proper couple. The thing is I really like him, and I’m afraid I could accept less than I should and go ahead with the fwb’s thing just to be with him. Also, I am not too keen on the people he has become friends with recently. Although we get on, on the odd occasion we contact each other, they have been known to ‘pick’ on me because I was the ‘geeky’ one in the class. Although these comments do not affect me in the slightest, my bf never defends my corner in front of them because he does not want to dent his reputation. His friends have told me that he hates me etc, but he is quick enough to call me when they are not there. I do not want to ignore him or base my decision solely on this point, I don’t want to get into a fwb or serious relationship with him if he lets his ‘friends’ talk bad about me to everyone. Recently he has been sending me mixed signals, for example, he can go from completely ignoring my messages, (usually when he is with his friends) to being all over me, asking me how far i’d go with him etc. But despite all this, we are still best mates, and get on really well. How can I tell what his intentions are without getting hurt? And also, I don’t want to get into anything, even just fwb, if he is only going to talk to me when it suits (I mean, he normally replies, just not always that enthusiastically). I played with the idea of coming out and telling him I like him, but I don’t want to risk the whole of our relationship. Sorry for the essay lol. I would be really grateful if anyone could give me any advice. Thanks
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female
reader, terrifenby +, writes (16 April 2010):
 Well when he is with his mates dont fret about the fact he is not texting you back. Thats his time to relax with his friends and do whatever it is boys do.
See it sounds like he is giving you plenty of signals himself. Just tell him you like him.. Ask him out.
Some times the best relationships are formed when you are best friends with the person before hand. Because you have your best friend and boyfriend rolled into one!
Go for it... Good luck
Hope i have helped.
:)
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