A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey everyone :) Well basically me and my ex boyfriend (we broke up in like feb last year!) got really close since the break up, as in friends, nothing else, although were so close like best friend close we can hold hands and stuff and know its just a friendship! Anyway during the summer we practically lived at each others houses and I got friendly with his parents and visa versa.Anyway back to school time in september, and I go to an all girls school, so obviously gossip travels at the speed of light! Anyway soon enough I hear a rumor that me and him had sex in a bush. Yeah ok whatever, another rumor. Of course me and him denied these rumors but its now december and I feel its still circling. It just wont go away! Sure its a pretty big thing to be passing around but jeeze im getting sick of it. All my friends whisper about it too and I dont know if they believe me or not.. or maybe they are just loving the drama. One of my male friends apparently started it, because thats what ex told him during summer when drunk! He says he didnt, and I trust him. Its just infuriating when people laugh and whisper at you, when I know damn well what they have been up too, but have the courtesy to keep quiet. Of course these things are never said to my face, so I cant realy confront them head on, and I dont want to bring it up! Any advice? I dont want people losing respect for me...
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2008): We have a proverb.The tree that bears the most of fruits gets hit with stones the most.
The most popular,the prettiest,the ones with the stunning figure and have guys proposing them left,right and center are the ones who get gossiped about the most.
Jealousy is one of the worst emotions anyone has to face.It eats the one who is feeling it from with in.It tries to crumble the person who is at the receiving end of it.
Dear there are two ways that you can live life.
1.Trying to explain each and everything people say about you
2.Ignoring them as people are cruel at times.
It takes years of practice to brush off comments that really hurt.Its easier said than done but not impossible.
Do you know why people are doing it more?Because you are getting affected.Bullies and Liars are people who you are going to face through out your life.
The people who you are so worried about will not be there for you when you need them the most.Society is not going to wipe your tears.
If you have even one genuine friend who trusts you completely its a happy thing.
I wish I could knock out all those obnoxious people for you.But Life is not as simple as that.
Stop bothering about what people think.I understand it hurts you all the more because you didn't do it.
You need to make yourself strong.Live for yourself.Not for others.
Learn to IGNORE.When they see what they are doing is not affecting you,it will stop slowly.You have to put up a brave face.
If you spread rumors about people who are talking about you,there is no difference between you and them.is there?
When we are faced with the worst of situations and come out with our dignity and honesty intact,that should say for something.
At your age boys brag about virtual conquests.I suggest you stop talking to that boy till he clears up his act.
Act cool.Give him the cold shoulder.Don't be bothered at all.
you are going to get talked about only till the next interesting thing happens.Its going to be hard till then.But Hang On.Its going to make you much stronger as a person.
All the Best Dear!Keep us posted.
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