A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I've been seeing a man for a while now and things have begun to get very important. We've talked about finance, living together, he even met my parents the other week. Yesterday I messed up totally. I went to supermarket and on the way back I thought I'd drive around to the place where he drinks sometimes with his mates - not to go in but just because I was missing him and not because I thought he was there either. I expected him to be with his mum who was coming out of hospital. It was ridiculous, but he was there and in his car. He saw me and drove up to my car, got out and started chatting. even kissed me through the window. I had panicked you see, got embarrassed that he would think I was checking up on him, which I totally wasn't. He was fine, but last night he texted to ask what I was doing. I have been honest with him and tried to explain what I was doing and why. I know it looks bad, but it was so so innocent. He now won't talk to me and says its a trust thing, he feels uncomfortable and can't get his head straight. I have to give him space, but I;m so angry that such a silly, impulse detour has most likely destroyed what we were building up. How can I make him realise I was not stalking him or even looking for him, and that I completely trust him. I was just thinking about him so much and wanted to see the place he went to.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 August 2010): Thanks for that reply. My friend has said the same. He's since asked to meet for a chat tomorrow evening. Have a terrible feeling all will not be well, but like you say it was a trivial thing.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 August 2010): You sound way too insecure. Maybe this is what your boyfriend is sensing. Give him the space. Don't say anything. He may be also having second thoughts about the way he has responded.
Ask yourself if you want to be in a relationship with somebody who would want to break it off over something so trivial. Maybe it is better you found out now before you mingled finance and living arrangements.
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