A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I've been with my boyfriend for two years now and I was never a jealous girl until we started dating. I guess it's when you realize you've got love, you don't want to share your man with anyone else. But he does talk about other girls a lot and flirts with them. I try not to flip out about it because flirting is harmless right? I mean, I'm just being irrational by trying to get him to stop when he clearly won't, right?*Sigh*, I just want to know how I can tame my inner green monster. Any suggestions?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2008): Hi dear,
First, you should realize that maybe he doesn't consider what he's doing as flirting. I've had a lot of boyfriends who are very friendly with other girls, but it's just that, friendliness. There's absolutely nothing wrong with him being nice to other women.
Second, you want to careful to not get carried away. When you're jealous you can very easily let your mind slip into nightmare possibilities. Think situations through very carefully. If there's not any concrete reason to suspect that he might be unfaithful, besides him interacting with other females, let it go. There's no point in worrying or starting a conflict with him about it. This will either change nothing or make the situation worse. If it is really bothering you, tell him. Don't complain or chastise his actions, just explain how you are feeling so that he will understand what makes you feel bad.
Third, if he wanted to be with those other girls, he would be with them. He chose to be with you and that makes all the difference.
Good luck!
A
female
reader, BlueCherry +, writes (15 November 2008):
Ah... women, we are just so darn complicated! a little jealousy is good to let him know that he "belongs" to someone, just don't go nuts.
Try to zone him out when he is telling you these things, ask about these women- get amuse by the way he sees other women, just don't loose your cool. He is your man afte all.
Cheers!
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