A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I want to leave my girlfriend but she's too dependant on me. I don't think she'll be able to cope.She says her life has never been as happy as it is with me and I've turned her life around. She says I've helped her get off drugs, move to a nice area, looked after her son, built her self-esteem and got her head into a more stable place.There's not another woman or anything, I just feel I've lost my freedom to do my own thing and feel I'm putting more into the relationship than I'm getting out of it. For example doing most of the house work and taking care of her financially. She also gets into strops (especially if I mention that she might not be doing her fair share), whereas I have a lot of patients. I love her for lots of reasons too and she's had a hard life. I don't want to make it any worse.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 January 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks. I'm not actually as sure about doing it as it sounds in the question. If I eventually do, I'll do everything i possibly can to make it less painful for her.
A
female
reader, BadAsh6705  +, writes (22 January 2008):
 Just be completely honest with her no matter how much it hurts her, she will eventually understand. Once you do break it off DO NOT give in to her when she tries to keep calling, wanting to see you, etc. Try to stay away from her for as long as possible so that she will realize that it is really over for good and it will be easier for her to get over it if she doesn't have contact with you for awhile. She will most certainly be heartbroken, maybe even mad after that, but time will heal things.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 January 2008): Wow! For someone who doesn't want to make her life any worse, seems like yo're planning to hit her with a cruise missile! Couldn't you talk about the issues that are concerning you? Sounds like she appreciates you but maybe you interpret this (and resent this) as her 'clinginess' - talk to her and explain how you feel.
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A
female
reader, Lola1993 +, writes (22 January 2008):
 Hi=)
I think,If you want to leave someone, it would be unfair to them and you if you stayed with them. It would bring you down and then have a likewise effect on them.
I think you need to tell her your worries,you really enjoy her company and really want to stay friends. And keep that promise. Stay friends and support her through the breakup.
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