A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've always had issues getting dates and relationships for some unseen reason, the only flaw that people i know can see when i ask them to honestly tell me what my problem is, they answer that the fact that i am basically a nerd and i wear clothing with stuff that i like that is far from mainstream. A lot of these comments came from girls as well, and they usually say "If you would dress different you would have a lot better luck". I see this as selling myself short, and changing part of myself for women which im not about to do when im not dressing badly just stuff most people dont appreciate. This really bugs me because girls always complain about guys being extremely shallow but they wont have interest in me because of whats on my jacket or shirt, that's on the same level or worse then what a lot of guys judge girls by. To be frank im getting more and more sick of girls and the way the choose boyfriends.I'm in college and when i left high school i hoped that by the time i was in collage some girls around would of grown past some of their flawed ideals about men and those they choose to date, not so and its starting to piss me off. Ive never had a long relationship for several reasons, and few girls have shown much interest in me more then friends. When i was in high school i guess i was too nice but by the end of high school on ive become sadly a much larger jerk then ive ever wanted to and the response disturbs me more then the small increase in jerk actions. Girls are eating it up, a literally had to tell a girl that was stalking me off before she left me alone, up until now ive never had that sort of problem till now. I don't like acting this way but it almost seems like the only way ill get dates or get any female attention at all. I started acting this way after a girl i had liked forever shot me down because she had friend zoned me, told her off and gave her crap whenever she complained about being single. To be honest she deserves it since she keeps dating jerks and tries to get sympathy each time it happens, and im more then glad to prevent that sympathy from occurring. It may sound bad but she had the nerve to complain about it a day after she rejected me for being her friend for all these years and treating her better then any of her "boyfriends" ever have its all a freaking joke. The real kicker is when she says she wants a nice guys, its a even bigger joke then everything else, she had one but that one is so sick of her stupidity never going to happen now.Almost all the women around me would rather date a jock or some asshole that hurts them a week later and they go and complain to someone usually some other guy that probably has a crush on her but she will just think its cute, and make fun of him behind his back for it with her friends who being fellow foolish typical females think its pathetic and tell her to use him basically. Using guys who love you to help heal your own emotional issues is wrong girls, if you haven't thought about it your getting one way emotional help while the guy suffers wanting a relationship but you would rather date Jerks over and over and then later in life have the nerve to ask what happened to all the nice guys. The answer being you, you using the nice guys emotionally and ignoring him for a well dressed jerk who will break your heart in a few months. And the cycle repeats till the nice guys one day gets sick of it and decides hey all the jerks are getting dates lets act like them and actually be able to get dates and have someone care about them for once in their lives, instead of having girl after girl using them. I know how all of this feels all to well, im so sick of women or rather girls, i really want to find one that i dont have to be a jerk around and one that will love me for who i am but ive yet to find that person because seemingly only 2% of females are actually intelligent enough to give the right guys a chance rather then leave them suffering emotionally more and more each day on the sideline. Being the guy who never gets a date has a major effect on your self esteem more and more time goes by when you are alone and watch others get girlfriends and dates. I just want someone to care about me not the me that could be. I want to stop having to put up a false front of jerk actions to get girls to acknowledge that i exist, but you girls have to change your choice of men before that it seems. How can i hope to find someone to love and be loved back when i cant even find a single girl that will date me as i am. Im not ugly, im not stupid, im not dirty, im nearly all you girls want but yet you are to blind to see it.What can i do to change this and yet not give up part of myself, how can i be noticed in real life and not in peoples sugar covered depiction of reality, because sorry being yourself and all the basic par for the course getting girls stuff doesn't work in real life so long as jocks and jerks exist.
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crush, self esteem, stalking Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 January 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionproblem is everything i wear is baggy because im tall and skinny, im 130 pounds and 6 foot. I eat a lot but my metabolism wont let me gain wieght at all. Its not like im not willing to change sizes...
A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (23 January 2010):
 Do a Napolean Dynamite Dance at the end of school year. Sorry I am just joking!
Reality happens after college. There are no more hunks who hit nerds in the locker room. This kind of behavior is not accepted in a work place.
The clothes I don't care that much. Just don't let all that faken bacon people drag you down.
I have a friend. He always tells me he is happy. He is also very cynical. He seems to be happy because everybody else is so stupid, make wrong choices, and he is the only one standing out. That's not real happiness.
School sucks. I hope you can just be yourself. Because I would rather date a nerd than a guy would dresses flamboyantly.
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 January 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionAlso i did like being friends and just that for a long time. Its her heartless action of complaining about being single in front of me. Thats like saying your worse then being lonely to a old friend.
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 January 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionkinda hard to have a good additude when my first love used me and girls are shallow around me. I know im not perfect an im not usually a jerk like this today im just really sick of everything .
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