A
female
age
41-50,
*heater32
writes:Hello all I am looking for some advice on learning to be organized and learning how not to stress but to relax and appreciate what I have. Which is a healthy family and a good husband that I love. Any idea's/experiences or books anyone has read that can help. I would also love new pampering idea's for stressed moms.Thanks!!! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 November 2008): Hi
Dance workshops great great way to relax and destress.
A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (12 November 2008):
 I'm not the best person to answer this question--you should see the state of my closet!!! Organization unfortunately is one of those ongoing maintenance things, and I'm definitely a slow learner in this arena. I think you just need to recognize that, and you will stress less about it. A few minutes a day, putting things away in their proper places, will keep the clutter out of the house and also your mind. (Now if I could only practice what I preach!)
That of course presupposes that you have a home for everything, which you probably don't, if you're anything like me. I think the key is to start small, take one room or one dresser or one closet. Take the one that is most disorganized and that is causing you the most stress.
Then go through that one thing and be merciless. Three piles, keep, donate, pitch. Keep means you need it or use it or should file it. Then DO that. If you need a filing cabinet, buy one. If you use it, think about where you use it and put it there. Donate the stuff you don't need but that someone else could use. The Goodwill store or local charity shop is a good place for that. Plus you get the tax write-off. Pitch. That's the most difficult. If you hang onto stuff because of sentimental value or because it might be useful some day, be realistic about it. If it is for sentimental reasons, could you just take a photograph of the item and put that into an album? Useful someday is okay to keep, just make sure it has a proper place in your house.
I often succumb to the 'rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic' situation when I'm trying to get organized. I have a room in my basement that has so much junk in it it is driving me nuts. My husband helped me by taking the big items out of it so that I could actually move around the room. I am giving things away via Craigslist and the local freecycle.org group. I would not recommend these in your case, as you are busy enough being a mom. Just give the useful extraneous stuff to the Goodwill or similar store, it's the easiest way.
Bask in the glory of a well-organized kitchen drawer or hall closet or whatever it is that you tackle first.
Time management may be an issue for you too. Break your day into 15 minute chunks and think realistically about what it is that needs to get done, then slot those tasks into the time frames. Don't forget to include some time for your own maintenance and sleep! Ask for outside help if you cannot string together 4 15 minute blocks; consider finding a neighbor teen as a mother's helper. There are a number of those in my neighborhood and they seem to be great help to the moms!
As far as pampering goes, I would make sure that I was part of a mother's group and share some of the misery. ;)
And most important of all, remember the priorities you just shared with us. If you have a healthy family and a great husband, you have more than many people do! So there's some clutter in the family room, or dust buffaloes under the bed, that's not the end of the world. Those lovely homes we see in the swifter ads? Generally a fantasy. You can reach that state for about 5 minutes, then real life takes over. Just let it go...
I personally am having some stress and have found that yoga helps. I have a good DVD which guides me through a relaxing, centering routine. If you can afford it and can find the time, try to find a yoga class, oherwise the DVD might be enough for you. The routine is anywhere from 10 minutes to 30 minutes, which I hope is doable for you.
Good luck, and congrats on the family!
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