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female
,
anonymous
writes: Hello,I met this guy who seemed so super. We went out on a couple of dates. He said that he'd fallen for me in a big way and I couldn't understand the connection that we'd made so quickly. He has done all the chasing.I now find that the phone calls and texts seem to have dwindled. What is going on?
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female
reader, Bibbi +, writes (17 May 2006):
 You seem to be rather confused? Thats completely fine. This happens to alot of women. When they get played around with by men for the fun. I'm terribly sorry to say this, i am, but it seems to me that he was just thinking of you as an easy target! Dont text him. Dont call him. Dont see him. If he comes crawling back, accept. It means he liked you. But if he accepts the ignoring. Ignore him completely! Good Luck xx
A
female
reader, DrPsych  +, writes (17 May 2006):
 I totally agree with Irish! You must be disappointed by the whole experience as he seemed full on and then cooled down. I think you should sit back and see what happens. It could be that something serious is going on in his life that is affecting the time he can spend on you. He may also be testing you by seeing if you chase him if he doesn't make the effort - this would be a sign of insecurity, and a gameplayer so not great BF material. But the most likely explanation for his behaviour is that he is not that into you, and you will notice the difference when you meet someone who is very right for you. Don't feel bad about it as this sort of thing happens to everyone. Instead, shrug your shoulders and think that it is his loss at the end of the day if he doesn't want to get to know you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 May 2006): It's just been two dates and irregardless of what he's said, his actions do speak louder. Learn to discern that. Some reasons are: He's had time to think about it and decided he's not for you or his interest has waned or he has other potential interests or he's playing a game. In which case, while these are the likely reasons why this guy will not want to take a friendship to the next level, it really doesn't matter what they are or if they make any sense to you. The bottom line is that if you should not have to be the aggressor, if you have to chase, if you have to do the asking out and the constant communicating, nine times out of ten, he's just not that into you and he loses, bigtime. Some people may suggest he wants to go slow. My take on that is-- If a guy truly likes you, but needs to take things slow, he will let you know that right away. He wouldn't keep you guessing, because he'll want to make sure you don't get frustrated and go away. This guy is not doing this. He's not for you...so move on, get out there, laugh, date and have a blast and..... forget about this other guy and tell yourself-you truely deserve a more affectionate, attentive boyfriend. He's out there...now get going and go find him. Good luck and be happy.
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