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writes: My Fiance proposed to me 2 weeks ago. We were away at the time so he put it on facebook. Most of his friends wrote a message or called him but his 2 BEST friends of 30 + years who he's travelled the world with etc are still yet to contact him. I found this really strange, why could this be? Also, when I mentioned it he said 'Greg hasn't even contacted me about the football result (how can he compare a football score to an engagement???!!!!)
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female
reader, WhenCowsAttack +, writes (14 January 2014):
Maybe it didn't show up in their news feed.
Myself and another mutual friend both recently missed a post from one of our longtime, dearest friends about losing her fiancee in a horrible car crash. We felt awful when we realized what happened, but it wasn't our fault.
Why the hell doesn't he just call them!
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male
reader, CMMP +, writes (14 January 2014):
Those bastards!
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2014): Why is this a big deal? And why is this a big deal to you?
I'm trying to understand what you feel the problem is?
You can wish your fiance happy birthday in person for example but not write in on facebook when facebook sends you a notification. Does that mean you love him any less?
No. It means you love him in real life.
Also, have you considered that as his best friends, they probably knew exactly when and how it would go down? They may even have made suggestions about how he should propose etc. As best friends do. In this case, the engagement is not a shocker.
Enjoy your engagement and your marriage and stop worrying about what people have NOT posted on facebook. You want them to congratulate you? Invite them for an engagement party.
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2014): It's just Facebook OP why does it matter? They might not have seen it, they may have things going on right now, they could be travelling, in hospital, in jail there are tonnes of reasons it could be. Not everything pops up on a person's timeline, plus if you don't have it set to most recent 'top stories' may not have it up there or if they do have it to most recent and they haven't checked in a while they can miss it in the backlog.
"Greg hasn't even contacted me about the football result (how can he compare a football score to an engagement???!!!!)"
Oh christ are you really one of those people that twists things on purpose to make them sound bad when they're not? OP he probably contacts him regularly about the football scores, how often do they contact each other about getting engaged? Are you really twisting that to make it sound like he was comparing? Are you really that bored you have to make that a bad thing?
OP you just got engaged and all you're focused on is points scoring. Are you keeping a list of people who didn't congratulate him so you can enact vengeance or something? It seems you're more concerned with people congratulating you than the actual engagement itself. They'll get around to it eventually. They've been best friends for that long so he knows they'll be happy for him, he doesn't need some Facebook platitudes to know that.
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female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (14 January 2014):
Maybe they were waiting for him to call them with his news? That was how it was done in the Dark Ages Before Facebook Took Over The World. Not everyone is on FB and of those who are, they aren't on it every day.
Assuming they are on FB everyday, then they are probably a bit miffed that he didn't call them, his BEST friends, with this life changing news, instead of impersonally posting it on FB. It's sort of a passive-aggressive, low-energy method of imparting news. I understand that FB changes the news feed settings all the time, maybe they missed it.
Generally, the one with the news is the one who calls. So I would not look for something to be miffed about here, I would encourage your fiance to call his BEST friends with his big news. If he can't be bothered to make that call, then let it go, they are his friends after all.
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2014): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOne friend always calls him, the other communicates through Facebook as he lives in Asia and neither have contacted him...just thought it's strange as they've known each other 30 +years and my fiance has never been married. One friend is single the other is in a long term relationship.
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (14 January 2014):
I think men use Facebook differently then women. Secondly, it's Facebook.
Maybe they will call and chat, but I'm not really sure what you were expecting? It is a HUGE deal for you and your fiance, maybe not so much for them? Are they still single or married themselves?
In all seriousness I wouldn't make a big deal out of it, it's HIS friends HE knows how they communicate with each other. And YOU can not control what other people do. If your FIANCE is OK with them not "posting" stuff, then why can't you?
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