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female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Im in love with my boyfriends, sisters fiancee.We flirt when we are together and when we r together he does all the a typical flirting body language.I know hes due to be married, but i feel deep down we are better suited. I think we are both to scared to admit it, in case our partners find out, although nothing has ever been said between us to confirm this.how do i know and how can i find out if he feels the same way?
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2007): The man is engaged, hun-you really need to back away. From what I'm reading in you posting, you are basing your 'in love' feelings for this 'otherwise, unavailable' man on simply some body language and flirting. No words have been spoken. We can't assume someone is interested in us, based only on flirting, hun. These are your perceptions and feelings. Usually actions and words have to come into into play. And if he's not making any moves on you or saying anything about spending his future with you, then what does that tell you? Some people do this whether they are engaged, married or not--they do it simply for fun-to feed the ego, a bit. You can't seriously propose to walk into the lives of this couple, due to be married and just 'blow their lives up' simply because you feel a certain way. You really have to remember, life is not a big game and we can just go in and grab a person we want. So please take note: if he was serious about you, she'd be gone and you'd be in. When you hurt other people, you usually end up hurting yourself, the worst. Leave them alone and move on.
A
female
reader, Lilly223  +, writes (9 January 2007):
 I'd recommend that you don't even TRY to find out. Think about the repercussions of 'trying to find out." You risk hurting your boyfriend, his sister, her fiancee, and the entire family for something that is a definite unknown, and for what seems like selfish reasons. If you don't love your boyfriend, then you need to leave and find another person (beside's his sister fiancee) to love. Persuing this will be nothing but destructive, cause hurt, and most likely cause an entire family to feel that you are a homewrecker. Be mature about this, and don't do it.
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