A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Dear doctor Pete. My boyfriend and I have been together for almost two years. I want him to be apart of my future-live together, travel even get a house and someday get married.I needed to find out where we stand and if he sees me in his future. While he says he does see me in his future and he loves me, he also said that it scares him to think of the future, because he has not had alot experience sexually and emotionally with women and the idea to committing to one girl right now scares him. My boyfriend is almost thirty and a slow bloomer. My question is do I just carry on with the way things are and go with the flow? Or do I let him go? What if we are together years from now and he still feels this way? Do I hang on, or give him up to experience other women? Help! Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2007): Let him go. Fifty percent of any relationship is timing, and the two of you are not at the same place. You want a committed relationship, he doesn't. Frankly, if he's that old, he may never want one. And while you're wasting your time on someone who may never want what you want, he's going to be out there having a good time.
If you "go with the flow" you will be miserable because it's not what you want. While you're with him, you're not seeing any other "options"; and there are a lot of great guys out there (really). Leave him where he is, and find the guy that wants what you want.
(If you do choose to stay with this guy, make sure you're protecting yourself from STDs. He's wanting to be with other women, and you never know what's out there...)
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