A
female
age
30-35,
*yyedarling@aol.com
writes:i'm fifteen. and i lost my virginity to this amazing guy. we were together a few months after i actually had sex with him for the first time. we didn't do it all the time. we've probably only done it 10-15 times. but about a month ago, he dumped me. and days later he has a new girlfriend. so i've cried myself to sleep every night because it's too hard to go to sleep at night knowing the guy i lost my virginity to isn't even my friend. so over the month we've been broken up, him and his girlfriend have broken up and his bestfriend and i have became the best of friends. just recently i started hanging out with him again (the one i lost my virginity to) and we just got back together last week. we had sex the night we got together but only because i believed every word he said. and then after the weekend was over, that monday night, he dumped me. he says he doesn't want a relationship and that he doesn't want to hurt anyone else. but i told him how he doesn't hurt me. and i poured my whole entire heart out to him (we were talking in text) and he doesn't reply. i haven't talk to him since. then today his mom texts me because she doesn't know we aren't together. she loves me, his sister loves me, his brother, and stepdad... i just don't get why he doesn't. and i don't know what to do anymore. i don't even care about school anymore. help?
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female
reader, [email address blocked] +, writes (13 June 2009):
[email address blocked] is verified as being by the original poster of the question![[email address blocked] agony aunt](/avatars/c5bffc88-1b07-456c-b2aa-14d9aa066b62.png) thanks to all the great advice. after a few months, i'm completely over him and us not being friends only made it easier for me to see all the bad in him and made it easier for me to move on.
i now have a boyfriend who treats me with so much more respect and doesn't make me feel like i have to do anything i don't want to do.
thanks everyone!
A
female
reader, mistakentragedy +, writes (17 April 2009):
 Hun. I'm not friends with the guy I lost my virginity to. Just because you have sex with someone doesn't mean you're going to be with them forever. Sex is something you do with someone you care about. And if you wanted it to be with someone that you were goin' to be with forever, you should have waited until you were married. I know I wish I had waited until I met the "right" person. But I know how you feel. Maybe he's looking out for your better interest. Maybe he doesn't want to hurt you or get in the situation of possibly hurting you. Or maybe he's just one of those guys who just wants sex. I've been in that situation. Just give it time. Try to heal. Just keep your focus on you school work, family, and friends. That's all I can say. Best of luck.
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