A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Is there some that could help me? Im in a messy relationship and im 5 months pregnant.Im 27, hes 53. Yes i know huge age gap but age is just a number.we've been together a year/was friends for a year before we got together. When we first got together, we agreed we wernt exactly exclusive, just seeing eachother casually, then after a month or so he iniated we become a couple, 100% exclusive and i accepted that. About another month later, i found out he cheated , twice. when we were just seeing eachother, he was also seeing someone else secretly.then within the month after we were officially an item, he was still seeing her and had oral sex performed on him by another woman too. Iv checked these women out, im not a judgmental person but theyre alot older than me, and quite haggard too.I Confronted the one hed been seeing, to be fair she was a very hurt woman. he had really led her on into believing something was there.i felt for her.and almost throttled him over the whole thing.i packed my bags and left, but he begged me to come back,would never ever do that again and said that because im half his age, he half expected me to go off him, or go with someone else, he said this woman was like a security net incase i hurt him.I dont quite know what to make of that. I have never cheated on anyone, but i have been at the recieving end a few times.He knows this yet still comes out with that?!Nowadays i still dont trust him, i do have serious trust issues. I know he loves me, as i do him, and were about to make our family bigger as we have other kids too from previous relationships, now one on the way, but every time he goes out, everytime he nips out in the car, im constantly wondering if hes gone to a womans house or something. we argue about it all the time, its growing tiring on us both now. I keep telling him to try regain my trust, but even im not sure how he can do that let alone expect him to know how. Im moody all the time, have gone off having sex with him , i know because im pregnant my hormones are all over, and labido slides a bit, but still its in my head all the time, this other woman! when we do argue he throws in my face the fact that before him id not had a relationship last more than 6 or 7 months, 3 men id been with cheated on me and the other, who he knows, was extremely clingy and needy after 2 weeks! i broke up with him after 8 weeks because i was really fed up! but my bf throws that in my face too! saying that i havnt got a good track record of previous relationships so how could he trust me in this relationship not to get "fed up" with him. Its almost like the guy is trying to minipulate me lol. opinions please! Right as it stands today, well usual arguments over trust and how moody iv been with him this week. not had sex in 5 days etc (usually its every 2 days), earlier, i admitted id been too moody and insecure, and snappy with him, over trivial things, and said i was sorry, but he went all prima donna on me, "yeh uv been moody, i didnt deserve it this week, youve been bang out of order" i said to him, you know, im trying to apologise here, but whats the point if ur only gunna moan and continue to throw it my face. I feel like im living with a prima donna! i wanna send him a text, to make him realise, to make him see that i want to sort this out, but im not taking his crap either! I want him to see what he has done wrong, because he dont seem to acknowledge this at all without pointing his finger at me at the same time. even though, iv never cheated lol. any ideas folks?????? P.s let it rip the smarter the better!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2012): "I want him to see what he has done wrong, because he dont seem to acknowledge this at all without pointing his finger at me at the same time. even though, iv never cheated lol. any ideas folks??????"
Maybe he thinks if he "saw" what he did wrong and admitted it instead of blaming you, then he wouldn't be able to get away with it over and over and over again any more.
"P.s let it rip the smarter the better!"
You're out of my league, Einstein. I'm sorry, but is it stupidity or vanity with you chicks. You don't need to him to "see" what he did was wrong, he knows, that's why he did it. You chicks need to "see" that only future degrades you, and in any even if you get him to "see" what he did wrong, he'll have a perfectly good reason or explanation that makes absolute perfect sense on the spot.
My thoughts and prayers to your unborn child.
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