A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hito love or not to love is my question!!i'm very happy with him, when i'm with him. when i don't see his face, when i don't hear his voice, when i don't have any picture of him in-front of me, i just think that i am in a big trouble .-he is very generous , yet his salary is very low-he is very funny and kind , yet he must be always right-he makes the impossible stuff to please me(comes daily a 1hour by car distance so we could have lunch together at my university , once i mentioned in a chat that i wanted to eat popcorn so hard and it was like 2 am he came to my home and left me a bag of pop corn for me to have grab so he wont get me in trouble with my family....) yet he doesn't do the little things i ask him to do, like not look at overly exposed girls or telling me what is the plan of his day, or telling me when ever he is online and i'm not with whom he is talking- i'm sure he loves me and when ever he looks at me its as if i'm the dream that came true to him , yet whenever he is away i just have the strongest feeling that he is cheating on me meanwhile whatever he says to explain why he was far i find it true.-he cares and cares and cares personally, yet when we are far he won't call unless i do, chat unless i do, tell me what he's doing unless i ask, knowing that he does say good-morning and good-night on his own. - at more than one occasion i was given the chance to leave him, i had the strength to do it, and once i did it , i hurt him and told him all what i'm telling you right now and i said that we are not meant to be together(even though i don't believe so), for 8 consequent days he was very friendly, very realistic, very weak without me yet very strong for me. at last when he came with 6 red roses to my door i couldn't prevent my tears from dropping and my body from hugging him and we got back together. he became perfect for 2 days then the old him! finally you need to know he proposed to me 3 weeks ago and i accepted because of course he was inf-front of me, yet whenever he is not near i just think i wouldn't be perfectly happy in my future if we did get married because also under the same roof he will have to go o work and stuff.note: he is the third boyfriend in my life, when i felt such feelings with the last two i simply ended the relation and looked for a better man and now we are friends , yet with this guy i can't think about being touched by any other human being, or having kids with them.what should i do?get married? leave? please help my head really hurts and my heart too
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 January 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni simply can't thank you enough anon_e_mouse!!! thank you
A
male
reader, anon_e_mouse  +, writes (14 January 2013):
 The guy is with you and shows you through his actions he loves you and wants to be with you. The fact he told his exes is a good sign.
It won't affect your relationship at all unless you let your jealousy go out of control. Stop giving him hassle and just concentrate on having fun together.
If you're no fun and nag him he'll eventually get bored and fed up and leave. He's with you for some reason so just have fun. If you're fun and light-hearted he won't leave.
He gets the BIG stuff right. Forget the little stuff and go out with him and have a laugh.
With regards to the job you can accept although I would advise against it. You don't want to spend all your time together. That would make things too boring and predictable.
He's with you. Have fun and he'll never leave. Nag him about this and that and the other and eventually he'll get fed up.
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionagian anon e mouse thanks for replying, i didn't mention it because i can do nothing about it, most of his x's are with him at work. One of the small things i ask is that he would not begin for example a facebook chat with them yet many times he does.meanwhile when we got serious he text-ed them all that he is finally in love with me. knowing that i didn't see the texts yet i trust him enough! add to that usually they ask about how are things going on between us and usually he answers good, and their is one time when we were apart for five long long days, he replied to an ex that i am giving him the revenge all the exes wished for.even though i know he simply has to stay in contact with them so he can keep a good atmosphere at work,it kills me to know that the woman he once kissed is smiling in his face and he is smiling back!is this normal?could this influence our relationship on long term? knowing that i am offered to work with him too next year, should i accept the job offer? sorry for the extra questions please help!
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male
reader, anon_e_mouse +, writes (13 January 2013):
Well I didn't know about him keeping friendships with his exes. That is not a good sign and that is a BIG thing. Just ask him to stop seeing them out of respect for you. You didn't mention this in your original post.
Other than that this guy does do all the BIG things for you. Yet you complain about all the little things. Just overlook the little things. They are not important at the end of the day.
With the exes thing though that would be an important thing for me so with this I'd talk to him to do something about it.
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwow!! Harsh replys but thanks anyways
And what i do for him is leaving all my friends all my family , parting, leaving job , leaving my clothes style and even leaving my food so i could reach a decrease of weight from 70 to 58 as he likes
And i know he is so special and that he loves me so much! But i do love him even more, i left everything for him and he can't change detials in his life like having friend ship with his many x's
And why i'm complianing so much is that i have men in my life doing it all asking for nothing in return! Yet i love only the one i'm with now
And yes we are both aware that he is going to live in hell with me yet he said:"i preffer your hell over the heavens of any other girl"
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reader, Serpico  +, writes (9 January 2013):
Like mouse said above, it sounds like a lot of women would be very happy with this guy. Perhaps you should give them a chance to be since you have so much to complain about.
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male
reader, anon_e_mouse +, writes (9 January 2013):
So he doesn't do the little things but he does the BIG important things? What more do you want? You want him to do everything? Tell me, what do you do for him?
If I was this guy, I'd walk away. Plenty of women out there would like a guy like this. Yet all you can do is pick holes in the little things that don't really matter.
He's in for a life of misery with you I can tell you.
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