He's the ONE for me--but he's taken! What can I do?

A female age 41-50, anonymous writes:

I've tried to move on with my life, but I'm so afraid that my chance at finding true love has passed me by. My best friend and I live in different countries (he's from Mexico and I hope to eventually return) but we became best friends when I studied abroad and met him in college. He says that I'm very special to him and he's very special to me, and the thing that has always meant so much to me is to have a boyfriend who is my best friend. The trouble is, that he's had a girlfriend for the past year and a half and he loves her and he told me that he just thinks of me as a special friend and it kills me. He says that he's not sure if he'll live his life with her, but when I asked him if he thought of me as a possible girlfriend, he said that he would have liked to share his life with me, but now he has another gf. He asked me if I would have liked to have been his girlfriend but when i asked him if I'd lost my chance with him forever, he just said something like, "I would have liked to share my life with you, but now I have another gf, I don't know if I'll live my whole life with her but I love her." I wish and wish he loved me back and I feel like he's perfect for me. I've tried to move on but no one else fills the void and I am so lonely!!! How can I ever find true love?

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A female reader, iNaRa  +, writes (24 June 2008):

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