A
female
age
30-35,
*milly
writes:I'm involved in a relationship where at first I used to tell lies but at the moment the guy is realizing that I'm full of lies and I was never honest with him at the beginning of the relationship. At the beginning I took it as a joke but now when he found out I lie to him he is now losing interest in me, while for me it's the time I'm getting serious with the relationship and I don't know whether he is ever going to believe whatever I'm going to tell him. Just imagagine how big I was embarrassed! I truly don't know how to make him understand that, that was just the beginning. Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, ArmyMedic  +, writes (17 April 2009):
 Does he not trust you because you lied about your health in a taxi once, or because you continued to lie after that.
A one off white lie is acceptable, unless you said you didn't have HIV, had unprotected sex and then said "well actually I was lying"
All lies have to be taken in context, but I'm guessing that what ever you have lied about has offended him and that is enough.
A
female
reader, emilly +, writes (17 April 2009):
emilly is verified as being by the original poster of the questionso you mean even if i explain to him why i told him lies he will not believe me.i mean to me it was not time to just start talking about my well being like that because we only meet in a taxi not like we meet somewhere to tell him about my well being.he is lucky coz i told him my name and where i live as well.imagine the taxi was full of people and he expect me to tell him the truth,besides that,that time i didn't fell anything for him.
...............................
A
male
reader, ArmyMedic +, writes (17 April 2009):
Why not? Why can't you tell the truth from the beginning? So you can pretend to be someone you are not?
This is so silly how can you expect anyone to fall in love with you and stay in love with YOU if you aren't who you pretend to be.
...............................
A
female
reader, emilly +, writes (17 April 2009):
emilly is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your advice but I did all this because at the beginning of the relationship I didn't know he was serious. In my life I have met guys who propose to ladies for fun and I thought he is also doing the same like guys. Is there nothing that I can do that will make him believe that I am serious now? I mean I just can't start telling the whole truth at the beginning.
...............................
A
male
reader, ArmyMedic +, writes (17 April 2009):
I went out with a girl like you, first she lied about her age (luckily she was still "legal"), later I found out she'd lied about her name! and then later on still that she had lied about a coke habit and sleeping with her drug dealer.
So excuse me if I sound harsh here!
He will never EVER trust you again, a couple of lies that you have told and can explain away, us boys are dim and will put up with, but once we uncover a network of lies and relise you are a compulsive liar, it's a whole different game.
He will not believe you when you say you have changed - You are a liar!
He will not believe that he is the only one - you are a lair!
You can see where this is going! He will never trust you and trust is what makes a relationship!
Better off try again with some one else and maybe some therapy!
...............................
|
