A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hello :)I'm hoping you can help me with this situation. A guy (who i'd known from school, but we rarely spoke) and myself have been seeing each other. We've only met up on 2 occasions, in addition to texting each other alot and chatting online. The first time didn't go so well, he was way too fast for me and he was sort of involved with another girl, so i told him that i didnt want to see him anymore (in a gentle way as possible) he also told me he loved me on this first occasion. I simply liked, but not loved him.We kept in contact (online + by text) and we agreed to stay friends. He asked me to go out for a drink with him and a few others (as friends) but i declined many times, because i knew that he would make a move on me. However, last weekend i thought "Oh i might aswel go, what harm will it do?" so i did. But i found myself trembling with nerves. Anyway he arrived to meet me with a couple of friends and there was this immediate tension, but as time went on I became more comfortable around him. We all got drunk and had a great time, then the words i'd been dreading came out of his mouth "Can we talk privatey?' and i knew exactly what he was going to say. Basically he apologised for screwing up before, told me he loved me and said many nice things to me, and asked if we could be together again. But all i could say was that i really liked him and i needed time to think things through. He walked me home and we had a really deep conversation, i told him about all the shit that has gone on in my life and he told me stuff about him. I'd never felt so close to anyone in my life, it was pretty amazing and i knew for sure i could trust him. We kissed and hugged many times during the course of the night, he was very sweet to me and kept asking if i was okay, putting his arm around me etc. Anyway, i havent seen him since. But i have not been able to stop thinking about him, he's on my mind 24/7. Then he text me for the first time yesterday because he had no credit beforehand but my heart literally skipped a beat when i saw his name come up on my phone. At first i just liked him, but now i'm just confused as to whether it's infatuation or love. Anyway the situation is that we've arranged to meet up again tomorrow night (just me and him i think) and i know he'll be expecting an answer from me; afterall i've had an entire week to think it through. But for some reason i'm afraid of entering a relationship with him, i have no idea why but i'm reluctant about doing so yet i've developed such strong feelings for him. He promised to me last week that he would take things slower with me (if i were to accept) and insisted that the other girl is out of his life. However, i just don't know what to do. I will appreciate any replies :)
View related questions:
drunk, move on, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2009): http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/154403/a_daters_guide_on_how_to_spot_a_player.html?cat=7
Check out this article on how to spot a Player. He has already shown you a few red flags.
He was involved with another "girlfriend" when he started pursuing you and even let you know about it. (He wants to see how tolerant you are of being one of his girls)
He tells you he loves you right off the bat when he couldn't possibly, he barely knows you and that the other girl is history. (He is flattering your ego, he knows women are competitive and you have "won" him) (This insures you make yourself available to him at his whim)
He texts and chats on-line a lot, then suddenly he has no credit on his phone after going out with you again...(read time to play another girl for a bit, he has you on the hook)
He gets you to spill your guts about yourself very early on by asking lots of questions no doubt. (He is learning about you and what he has to pretend to get you, most people take time to be so open with their date, taking the time to really get to know them)
Doesn't sound like he is a genuine guy to me, you are reluctant for a reason....listen to your gut on this one.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2009): No because you are reluctant!
...............................
|
