A
female
age
36-40,
*meliab
writes:I've been with my Boyfriend now for a little over 10 months, I really love him and I actually feel like he really loves me, however I have an issue which is only getting bigger and bigger. With his job he goes away for weeks at a time (since we got together he's gone away 5 times, the shortest being a few days, the longest being ten days) and I always miss him...I understand this and I get over it. When he is away he will always txt me, call me on skype, send me messages on facebook whenever he can (if he can) and this is great, I meet him at the airport when he gets back and we always hug and throughout the time apart and on that first day he comes back we say how we have missed each other so much.my issue is this; When he is away we actually talk more than when he is home (we live separately but very close to each other...its a five minute walk to each others houses) we also say that we love each other more when he is away (when he is back he will say it maybe once a week and ALWAYS during sex NEVER at any other time...whereas I would like to say it whenever I want, but because of this I feel there is a sort of limit on the amount that I can say it.The saddest part for me is this...txts that I receive from him when he is away will have 6 or 7 kisses...as soon as he is back it goes back to zero. The txting stops, the calling stops and its back to the old routine of...see him on weekends, leave sunday night....see him again one day during the week and then again on the weekend...a constant circle of him dictating when I am there and when I can see him.Another thing is I tried to get him to say whether he see's me in his future with a question that was worded well and his response was "I dont think about the future I dont see any point in it....live in the now!" which upset me, obviously. I mainly asked because I wanted to know whether he saw us living together in the future because to me this will never happen, I just dont see him ever asking me.I just dont understand why he can say he misses me so much (and proves it by skyping me whenever he's away) but then as soon as he is back at his house its like I don't exist at all and it's back to the regular life we have...I can understand it happening eventually but why cant we spend more time together after he comes back? This last trip he took he was away for 10 days and he called me from the airport before he flew off, in tears saying how he didnt want to leave me (he said the same in a txt message when he landed) then when he is back its like he was making it all up...because after I picked him up I saw him for 24 hours and I havent seen him for 3 days since then...he also hasnt called me.Can anyone think why this might be?
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female
reader, Abella  +, writes (20 October 2012):
 His anxiety level goes off the richter scale when he is away from you as he is so terrified of losing you to another guy and being too far away to do anything about it.
Let him know in great streams of fullcome PRAISE how much you love his love notes/text loving.
When he is home he feels secure and knows that if there was a problem he could be there to iron it out in five minutes.
Just let him know that you love him unconditionally but they he needs to recognise that you are a tactile, sensual woman who needs to hear that he loves you when he is away and when he is at home.
Tell him that otherwise you will start to worry that he is taking you for granted too often and too much.
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