A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: I have been having seeing a man on and off for a number of years. Orginally we started dating for a couple of years and although we did sleep together in the same bed we never had sex becuase he said he didn't want to take advantage of me. He went to live abroad for a few years and has now returned and we have started seeing each other again, this time sexually also. I've never been able to let go of him hence, getting back involved with him. However, I am not sure where this relationship is heading, if anywhere and friends have told me to forget him as he is useless and takes advantage of me. He only sees me every few weeks and but we are in contact every week even though we do not live far from each other. We do try to arrange to meet up, but he is always letting me down last minute. He also often gets depressed and is emotionally unavailable. He is very hard work to get close to and it always seems to be me making the effort to see him, but for some strange reason I still really care for him and want to get close to him, but do not know how. Please can you advise me. Thank you.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2007): Walk away - he is obviously not that interested. If he really wanted you he would make sure you were the centre of his universe. Go find someone who makes you feel that you are the most important thing that ever happened to him!
A
female
reader, shania +, writes (14 January 2007):
Sounds like he is either married or he has a girlfriend.If he hasn't,he seems rather strange to me.What a feeble excuse to say that he wouldn't have sex with you even though you shared the same bed...how bizarre? This man doesn't want a proper relationship with you,that is so obvious,you say he gets depressed but your not his psychiatrist,if he's that bad then he should seek medical help.This is going nowhere,you have invested far too much of your time and energy with this man...walk away and never look back.There is a man out there for you who will want a relationship not some half baked drifter,who's too scared or half hearted to have an adult relationship with a woman.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2007): I quite agree with the first answer. This guy doesnt sound like he wants the kind of relationship you do and everyone deserves to be treated properly. I recently walked away from a long term cohabiting relationship and it was the hardest thing I ever did to come to that decision and walk out the door, but in time it turned out to be the best thing. I hope that you can find someone who deserves you.
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A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (14 January 2007):
It's absolutely great that you still care for this guy so much. I just wish he could afford you the same privilege. You deserve to be loved wholly and completely and it doesn't sound like this guy is capable of that just now. Although I think you'll find it hard I would finish things with him and find someone who really cares about you. You deserve that.
CD
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