A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I met this guy about 2-3 months ago, and when we first started hanging out I think we hit it off really well. We would spend 2-3 days out of the week together. I usually don't sleep with men so quickly, but for some reason I decided to with him. This was maybe about a month in. We would text everyday, then it turned to every other day which is completely normal since we weren't exclusive to one another or anything. But then I started really, really liking him. All of a sudden, we both got really busy, but mostly on his side. The texting dwindled down to maybe every 3-4 days, and we started hanging out much less, maybe once a week. It was difficult to schedule times to hang out with our busy schedules. What I am confused about now is, we haven't slept together in a long time nor has he made the initiative to show affection or kiss me the times we do hang out. We'll flirt, and maybe touch each other briefly but we haven't kissed or anything like that in a long time. What do you guys think of this? Has he lost interest in me? Is he now taking things slow because he is starting to like me too? I am confused.
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female
reader, llifton +, writes (27 February 2013):
 it sounds to me like this guy has lost his interest, for the most part. human behavior is quite simple. where there's a will, there's a way. he would find time for you, despite being busy, if he was interested enough.
if i were you, i'd just cut contact. because keeping in touch with him may just mess with your mind more than anything. good luck and you deserve better anyway!
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (27 February 2013):
 yeah it seems to me it's over and done....
the first couple of months of any relationship are good...
throw early sex in and it's great....
only time can tell if the relationship can sustain itself...
if he's not making time for you, then he's lost interest.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (27 February 2013):
 Do you know if he is actually dating someone now?
Seems to me that he lost interest after you two slept together. Could be that he is a "thrill of the chase" kind of guy. But he keeps you in the "back up" pile and in touch in case he finds himself alone?
No matter HOW busy people are, if they are SERIOUSLY interested in another person they WILL find the time to call/talk/text.
I don't think he is taking it slow because he likes you back, honestly I would think it's more of a don't want to hurt you by "dumping" you.
My advice... Don't DO casual sex if you want a relationship. Take the time to get to know a guy before having sex. Know what YOU want and what HE wants before. Casual sex rarely seems to end well, because in the end one of the parties starts to develop emotions for the other.
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A
female
reader, Denise32 +, writes (27 February 2013):
 It sounds as though his interest has evaporated at this point.
A couple of observations: it's nearly always a mistake to have sex with a man in a very short time of meeting him. (Unless you WANT it to be a one or two times fling).
Better to take it slowly so you can get to know one another, and he can "chase" you. Men tend to lose incentive when women who are too "easy." My father used to tell me that a man chases a woman until she catches him.
Second point: we all get busy, that's normal. However, if a guy really does like you and wants to develop a relationship, he will make the time to see you, even if his current schedule only allows once a week for the time being.
I'm sorry, but your comment about being really busy, mostly on his side, tells you all you need to know.
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