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female
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*mi27
writes: Hi, i've been in a relationship for almost 4 years and now we've started to discuss whether we're going to make a further step, e.g. marriage, or not. My boyfriend (34) is concerned that we're quite different and he's not sure if we would be happy together. We do argue quite often, that's true. He says he's scared sometimes to talk to me about some things because he's afraid that i'll get angry. I never knew that he feels this way and it makes me sad. I know, i'm sort of bossy in our relationship, but never wanted to cause this problem. I'm not saying he's an angel eighter, he does hurt me sometimes too.(not physically) I'm suggesting to try to work on our relationship more and discuss every problem and see if we can go on in our relationship but he doesn't really hope in change. I suggested to break up then and he just doesn't want.He says we do have often great time together as well, that i'm a great person who he loves a lot and doesn't want to make a wrong step to let me go. I'm so confused! What does he want then? I asked him several times but he is just confused and don't know what to do. We've got a strong love, but probably lack of understanding. Is there something we can do? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, spazziecat +, writes (25 April 2006):
My boyfriend and I just went through this. At least he doesnt want to break up. Mine did. He said the exact same things to me. He never wanted to talk about problems, he just wanted to sweep them under the rug. I was the one that always wanted to talk. It sounds like a lack of communication. I know thats what went wrong with my relationship. If your love is strong then you will get through it. Ask him if he would be willing to go to relationship counseling.
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