A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:I am interested in a guy who likes me too. However, our problem is that he is too hung up on past issues. Apparently both of his previous girlfriends cheated on him. I want him to take a chance on me, I want to get to know him. While he is interested, he is too cautious for my liking. he is so unbelivably insecure because of these girls...he tells me he feels worthless and uninteresting...though to me, he's the most beautiful interesting guy I have ever clapped eyes on!! How do I boost his confidence, get him to open up to me? basically, it seems that these girls have bled him dry for any confidence he may ever have had. I want to 'fix' him. In the sense that I want to help him overcome this, not for my benefit, but for his own..I want him to realise how amazing he is, and if a relationship comes out of that, great. If not, that's fine. But how do I make him confident?
View related questions:
confidence, insecure Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, oliviaclairex  +, writes (25 November 2009):
 You said you don't care if a relationship comes out of this, so get closer as friends.
It is hard trusting people sometimes, if you like him and care about him, just don't turn your back on him.
He will open up, if he has anything to open up about in time. Just make sure he knows that you are there, and you aren't going anywhere, and that's all you can do. Give him confidence, by simply telling him what you think of him. Just don't get too hooked on the fact he's so innocent, and been hurt and kind, because you want to still be able to give your own opinion and say and do what you want. Don't think you're always going to hurt him so don't want to say the wrong thing.
If you get really close as friends,who knows. A relationship may come out of it(: x
A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (25 November 2009):
 Fix him?
That usually doesn't end well.
You might want to ask yourself, who is he really. Did those girls (and have you got some evidence this really happened) make him this way or is he like this always?
I just have seen to many cases where guys hang up a sob story so that the girl can get her mothering instinct going and put up with all kinds of crap because he is so hurt.
Don't know if that is the case here, but in my experience "the boyfriend project" just never seems to work out.
Proceed with caution.
...............................
|
