A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:hi, I've been in a relationship with this guy for almost 2 months. He treats me really well and all that. The thing is that he's always bringing up anal sex. A lot of the time he brings it up in a joking way, but I know he's just testing the waters. I'm pretty open sexually, and I really enjoy giving oral and do it often. I'm just not into anal, and as of right now, I never plan to do it. I've been telling him that if he's lucky I'll have anal sex with him one day, I haven't completely ruled it out, and he keeps asking. I can't tell how important it is to him. Is it better to just tell him absolutely not, never? Or is it better let him have his fanasy and not dash his hopes?
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female
reader, Fairy_Lu  +, writes (16 October 2007):
 Ok if you never want to do it (and i defiently wouldnt it can cause real problems) then just come right out and say NO! And if he keeps pushing tell him you will do it if he does it first, it usually works. Dont let him push you into anything you dont want to do
A
female
reader, TELLULAH +, writes (16 October 2007):
 Hi,
I would tell him that if he takes it up the bum first, and manages not to pooh, you might think about it. That should put him off, and if it doesnt and he likes the idea, I would run for the hills. L.O.L
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 October 2007): Sexuality is weard weard weard and diferent people diferently express themselves. I think since you said that if he is lucky youll do it one day, you are in deed open for it even though this idea seems weard to you in this moment.
my sugestion: try it yourself first. Be gentle and use lubricant. Try by just masturbating analy and see if you like it. If you find it satisfying you can take a chance with your bf.
good luck
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 October 2007): I for one am very glad you have posted on this subject. I'm pretty tired of people who say anal sexx is so amazing etc etc. For goodness sake your anal passage was designed for excretion. It is full of germs for that reason and is extremely delicate in internally. Whilst there are many pleasure zones both near and around it...it is perfectly possible to avoid having to penetrate it. I don't know what others think but I consider a man to have bi-sexual tendencies if he is obsessed with anal sex. If you don't want to do it, and why on earth would you, just tell him. Perhaps you could ask him at the same time what he finds so enticing about the prospect of it? If he persists find another boyfriend.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 October 2007): The bottom line is that you don't do anything you don't want to do.
By telling him that you might do it 'one day' has given him the idea that it might happen sometime soon. You've got to tell him what you've posted here - that as of this moment your inclination is never to do it, and he has to stop going on about it or it'll put you off the idea for ever.
To my mind, one's anus is for an entirely different purpose and this activity is not normal.
Phil
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