A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My mom is dating this guy who's about 10 years older than her... Well he has a son (I'll call him matthew) and hes really cute and sweet and just totally perfect... he thinks the same of me... i know your probably thinking whats the problem then... well hes 27..... and that would make him 12 years older than me.So i want to know is it wrong to like each other... or weird because of our parents? Oh and one other thing..... were both single but "messin' around" with someone else.... even though hes not into her and im not sure if i like him.thank you so much!!! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2009): My Boyfriend is 12 years older than me....but I am 27.
Personally though I find it very strange that a man of 27 would want to date a girl of 15? You are still very impressionable and he knows that - any 15 year old is. The problem with a guy like that is because he can easily mess around with his partner (and hide the fact that he is with you) it shows your relationship for him is not serious - it's a convenience. He will play you and your innocence and then....when all that is over.
I'm sorry at this stage rather take a chance on a guy your own age or a little older than be emotionally damaged by an older guy - just because he has more expereince and the gift of the gab.
Just be careful - and don't be surprised when you turn 18 that he will be looking at younger girls!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2009): i agree she should wait. and im not trying to encourage her or anything but in a way arnt we all being told that love doesnt matter on age is matters how u feel about someone i mean atm im turning 14 and i like a guy thts 19 n he likes me we go out to the movies n have fun but we r staying just friends i mean we kiss n even though my mother doesnt like the idea of us she jsut wants me to be happy. and im happy with him he makes me smile and laugh n i mean its great anyone could do that but they cant i mean i havnt been this happy in like what 4years i kno along time but yea... im happy with him and if people think thats wrong i dont care thats their opinion they can think what they want its how i feel and he feels....
but yeaa.... i guess these people are right i agree and yea but no matter what anyone says it hasnt changed how i felt bout him the past yr i mean i only came out n told him i like him like 4months ago so he admitted he liked me to so we have been going to the movies often but its not like we are having sex or anything i mean inst that the only thing thats illeagal?
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (8 May 2009):
 Your mom is an adult, then a decade means little. THe older you get the small the difference.
But you are a child involved with an adult. He has lived for almost twice as long as you have.
He already gone through all those things you have yet to experience. He finished school, graduated, got a job, perhaps moved out etc etc. He lives or SHOULD live in a different world.
He is old enough to have kids of his own. How right do you think it is for a person who could set a curfew for his kids, to date someone with a curfew?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2009): wow i thinkk you're just infatuated with him and he wants to get into your pants..so not such a good idea :) even though i'm sure you dont want to hear that but it's the truth. move on find someone maybe 1 or 2 years older than you and yu'll be set haha
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A
male
reader, GrimmReality +, writes (8 May 2009):
 Young lady,
The age of consent in most U.S. states is 18, so you understand that if he so much as breathes on you and someone takes it the wrong way, that he could get in trouble.
Unless you live in an Appalachian state, this is generally frowned upon as an inapropriate relationship.
Id say that for right now that you hold off. when you are 18 then that is a different story.
But I really do understand how you feel. I am 44 and the last female I have been dating (casually of course, as we know that it's probably short term) is 21. we both take it for what it is
But please be patient. In the meantime I would suggest that in reality you dont hold out a lot of hope that either of you will be feeling the same way when you are 18. Best to stay within your age group.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2009): Oh that is SO illegal. No 27 year old should be able to look at a 15 year and think she's attractive. That's called being a petifile. If you must be in a relationshpip with this man, put it on hold for a few years
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A
female
reader, mrs.smith81608 +, writes (8 May 2009):
I totally agree with the first poster. There is no way I'd like my daughter date some who is 12 years older than her. He is a man, who in my opinion, shouldn't even look at a girl under the age of 18. He also shouldn't be even telling you that he thinks you're cool and sweet and perfect. I'm sure you are all of those things, but HE shouldn't be the one telling you that. A boy in your class or grade should be saying those things, not a grown man. Boys the difference of your ages (12 years old) are having babies, think about that.
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