A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:After 9 amazing months my girlfriend was having tough times (family and finances) so when the summer started we both had jobs and both lived an hour away. During our 9 months there were no indications that she thought we were 2 serious. I could tell she was dealing with something so when she told me she wanted space i told her id give her a week 2 sort things out. After the week, we met and she basically told me that next year will be worse because i was going off to college and that she was scared of getting hurt next year. She just gave up on us like that so idk what 2 think. She never gave me a chance 2 c how things would go. I would be able 2 c her just as much next year because my college was only 30 minutes away from hers! I really believe that i can c her more next year but she doesnt. She also said in a txt and i quote "i want you in my life too, but you dont understand how i want you in my life. And thats okay. I know you dont like it and i never ever wanted to hurt you." Then the next day she txts me "I am just scared that you really wont talk to me or see me anymore. I want you in my life. Maybe some day we will be okay, and i hope its sooner than later." She knows i want things to go back to the way they were ( and i told her i could make that happen if she tried 2). She just wants me in her life as friends and everyone knows that will never work. Does she really expect me to wait for her? She knows I want her back but she doesnt know what she wants!!! ( shes said that multiple times). Im gonna tell her that im not waiting for her 2 make up her mind because she cant play with my heart like that. I love her more than anything and she told me that she loved me but needs time. Her mixed fellings are driving me mad!!! Should i reject her if she comes back? What shes doing is causing me so much pain. Please help with advice Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 August 2009): This sounds pretty familiar to me - I think you'll be doing the right thing by telling her you can't wait for her any more - otherwise, she's just gonna carry on taking her own sweet time. At least once your actually apart, she can either find out how much she misses you (and confirm to herself she wants to be with you) or she'll think being apart is better - in that case, it'll be hard but it's better you're not with someone who thinks that way.
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