A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey, never used one of these sites but really need impartial advice...Were do I start... Few years ago I met a guy.. we split up and met up again last year when he was with a woman who he has child with and this start an affair they have recently split. I then found out I was 30 weeks preg with his baby. He took news well but asked for me to keep his name quiet until he got it round his head. Now my son is 8 weeks he's met him once and contributes nothing financially, no one knows he's the father and his family know nothing about his son! Should I tell his family? Do you think they have right to know? Or is it not my place? Help! X
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (12 October 2011):
 He needs at bare minimum to be supporting his child financially. And yes his family has a right to know about a relative especially a grandchild...
If he is not listed on the birth certificate and he is not acknowledging his child or his responsibility you need to get a lawyer and a DNA test and make him man up.
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (12 October 2011):
 "Do you think they have right to know? Or is it not my place? Help! X "
They have a right to know, and whats more important: your child has a right to get to know his family. Even as an infant. It is your place to speak up as well. You are the mother of his child, it's your call if you want to speak up or not.
Make him contribute financially. Get yourself a lawyer if you need one, and read up on your rights and the law when it comes to what a parent must contribute with financially. Also get things like custody sorted out.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2011): This is a hard situation and I'm sorry that your going through it. Firstly, do they have a right to know, yes I do think that they have a right to know. Secondly, do you have the right to tell them, I'm sorry but no you don't. Fact is that they are his family and if he doesn't want them to know, then he has that right too. As for him not contributing anything to your son, that is dispicable. I know my niece has gone through this, in the end she had to go through mediation with the child services. He may ask for a DNA test, and then they will help you sort out financial support from him and visitation if he wants to see your son. That may make him tell his family too, but maybe not. I do think that when it comes to his family you shouldn't tell them, it is up to him to let them know and decide if he wants them to know, if you do say something to them it may cause trouble from him that you really don't need. I wish you the best of luck.
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