A
female
age
26-29,
*edstars14
writes:I am 14 and me and my friend haven't really been great recently, I guess the most important thing to mention is he's also my ex-boyfriend. He lives more than an hour away and this is one of the reasons we broke up (about a year ago) but I insisted that we stay friends. And we both want more than friendship really but it's just not practical. But recently we had agreed to have sex this summer it would be both of our first times. But we didn't really talk about it properly like what we would become, contraception, what we would do if it went wrong. Anyway one saturday I was out with a load of friends and he sent me a text asking for a picture of me because his friend wanted to know what I look like. I replied telling him to go on my facebook page and he said and I quite "you're just trying to get me to get facebook we agreed I'd get it once I've done you." And it was like something snapped inside me, I was so mad. He made me feel so unimportant in that moment like an object or something. I didn't say anything to my friends as I hadn't told them what I was planning to do that summer. But that weekend I wrote him a really harsh letter telling him it was off and he was such a bad guy and everything. On monday I told my friends and copied the letter out on my phone it ended up being 14 sms long and I sent it to him.He texed back later asking me if I was in a bad mood or if I was serious and it was off. I didn't reply. Two days later I lost my phone and haven't found it since. I got a new phone and asked his sister for his number I texed him telling him we needed to talk. He was really short with me and was mad, I asked him if he would stay mad at me forever he said he didn't know. A couple of days later I phoned him and we had a really long talk. He hates the world and is really bitter, he says that women only ever like him not love him because he was always nice before now. I'm worried that he means me, and that I'm making his life too hard. I can't stand to live without him but I'm pretty sure that I'm making his life really tough. Am I being selfish by keeping him in my life when maybe he would be better off without me.
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male
reader, Was  +, writes (10 August 2010):
shh shh shh dont think like that ok, it was wise to call it off, let him suffer it sounds as if he's just mad cuz he tries to have sex but it doesnt work, its good that you said no, the thing in this day and age for guys is playen the suicidal card instead of getting up and actually doing something about it, they make girls feel like it's there fault, so you did the right thing now do it again and ignore him or try to just be a friend and if he is still mean, walk away
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