A
female
age
36-40,
*tstar1286
writes:I have a difficult question! I have been living with my roommate for almost two years now.We recently hooked up, had sex however he has a girlfriend and he made an effort to try and make me a friend of this girl. He has acted like nothing has happened between us but his girlfriend has not come to our apartment in over a month. He however makes the trip to her house. I have confronted him and told him how I felt about him, I have walked away feeling more like an idiot than anything else. He finds me physically attractive and wants to be with me physically but dosn't want to ruin our friendship so he stays with his girlfriend. I am so confused? What should I do?He is spending Valentines with her and not with me I feel like he has made his choice am not worth his time. Am I just not making an effort. Because I don't call I don't text him the way I feel. I don't show it unless we are being intimate.
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female
reader, ktstar1286 +, writes (13 February 2009):
ktstar1286 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all for the advice. I know I need to move out of my current situation. I appreciate everyone being so honest with me.
A
female
reader, Manya +, writes (13 February 2009):
It sounds to me like there is too much sexual tension in your apartment for you to remain roommates. He can't have his cake and eat it, too! He is indeed "fooling with your heart" and his girlfriend is not being treated right either! I would suggest that either he moves out, or you do: I don't know about your lease situation? Preferably it would be HIM.
That would help to clarify things in all ways!
In my experience and that of my friends, having an opposite sex person as a roommate is a tricky thing, and if the line is crossed, it's hard to keep going as roommates.
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A
male
reader, Griffo  +, writes (13 February 2009):
 If its your house kick him out and tell him a bullshit story that your new boyfriend from out of town is moving in soon and is pissed at the way he's treated you.
I find it really enoying how he has taken advantage of you and I know if this happened to one of my GF's I would kick the shit out of the bloke whos fooling with her heart. You need to have some protection from another bloke who'll look after you in these type of circumstances - these are the nice guys that are your friend they will look after and protect you when the real shit goes down. Do you have a bloke thats a good mate? who will put some words in his head and warn him?
or;
Id call his GF and meet up with her and tell her what happened. But know that if you do this she will realise you are only telling her because you have become his second best and he wanted her. The challenge is making her realise what went down and what he did with you and what he promised you by being with you. A good way to do this is by making her percieve that you did not want him and that it was a huge mistake and that you are very sorry but you thought she deserved to know at the least. you will need to be strong as if you didnt care. Or; that you completley thought it was over with him and her -- ?see where im going? -- it will all turn around onto him and he will be the one that gets hurt - not you.
success is the best revenge!
Let me know how you go.
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