A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:okay so i am almost a senior in high school and theres this one guy that ive known since 6th grade..i know he has had a very big crush on me since 7th grade when i had him in two of my classes, hes a shy guy to a certain point. Now i feel like since were getting older, hes getting more and more not afraid of me but i guess more intimidated. I always find him staring at me and he gets so nervous when hes around me but, were not in middle school anymore. im almost done with high school and i just wish he could start making a move or something. Like, what should i be doing to show that im interested? i always feel like a "creep" if i was to hold eye contact with him or go to his basketball game when there not a big home game. I just feel like he would make me so happy. Hes such a good guy and and sometimes when im around him i cant ever wipe the smile off my face. I have prom coming up in a few months and i want
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female
reader, grey_eyed_phoenix +, writes (31 January 2010):
OK. If he's staring at you and then getting nervous, he likes you. :) Very good thing!
So you are right about the holding eye contact thing. That would probably scare him. So, try this instead. This is one of the more powerful things in a girls flirting arsenal. Smile. When he is looking at you and you two meet eyes, hold for long enough so he knows you've seen him (this will be very fast) and then look down, look back up and smile. When you are feeling a little more confident, lightly bite your bottom lip.
True story: I was 18 and this guy was 24 (we were coworkers at the same restaurant before I left for college that fall), I knew he thought I was cute and I knew he was shy. I caught him looking at me and I smiled one of those genuine smiles. He asked me on a date at the end of that shift. Smiling is an amazing thing. It shows that you are a happy person, someone people want to be around, and it gives the guy looking at you confidence. Usually the confidence to talk to you. It also shows that you are confident, which most guys find very sexy. (Just trust me on that one.)
You said you two were friends, so tease him. (Smile!) Get him to show you some basketball moves. Find a way to spend time with him outside of the normal class time, but don't make it seem like a date. Make it seem like you two are just friends hanging out. Let him make the moves from there. It might be to you best interest to get him to teach you something or help you with something. Worst case, you have made a new friend who has guy friends who play on the basketball team.
I would first just smile at him and then give him a week and see what he does. He might pluck up the courage to talk to you. Also, give him an opportunity to do this. Do NOT travel in a group of your friends. If he's shy, he will not approach you with them around. I'm sure you know that though. :)
Good luck!
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (31 January 2010):
I think you should go for broke and tell him you like him. Guys are rubbish at reading all those signs women send out. If you want him, then be direct and tell him you like him and want to go out with him. It's the only way to be sure. You could send all the signals and flirt all you like, but if he's confused, he won't do a thing. Talk to him.
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