A
female
age
41-50,
*uffpuff
writes:I am on the verge of leaving my boyfriend and breaking up our family ( I have a 13 year old daughter and he has a 3 year old son) but Im not sure if the reason is justified or if Im being unreasonable. Ive posted questions before concerning our situation. He often goes 2 or 3 days without having sex with me..in fact, rejecting me when I try, but will masturbate (sometimes shortly after I leave the room) instead. He won't talk about it and everytime I try to figure out why he's doing it he yells at me and gets defensive. He says its fast and easy and that's why, but it makes me feel like he's not attracted to me anymore. We have both gained weight this year (about 15 lbs) but I dont look at him any different. I am a little insecure with myself right now so Im not sure if thats part of why I get so offended and hurt when he does this. I know he won't change, but I dont know if this is acceptable or not, and I dont know if its really me that he's not attracted to or if its what he says it is, just easy and quick. Either way, it really hurts and its ruining our relationship. Everything else is wonderful. Weve had many issues in our 1 year together but weve made it through alot. He's changed many things about himself already to be with me (he quit a job he had for 10 years that conflicted with our relationship)and I kow he loves me. This is our only issue that I can't seem to let go.
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female
reader, buffpuff +, writes (17 January 2011):
buffpuff is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your help, Its nice to know I'm not just going crazy here!
A
male
reader, eddie85 +, writes (16 January 2011):
 This has to be a really hurtful situation and I don't think something is right. Normal guys would prefer to have sex with their woman versus rubbing one off.
I am not sure what the answer is here for you, other than it sounds like he is too busy pleasuring himself and doesn't want to be bothered worrying about whether you are satisfied or your needs. This is a pretty selfish position to take. Was he always like this, or is this something new? Is he turned off by you? Perhaps he is too shy to say something.
Before you go any further with this guy (i.e. marrying him), I think you need to get to the bottom of this. It's also my guess that he is doing it more often then every 2-3 days.
Also, you may also want to up your game and dress seductively, drop some weight, or put your best moves on him to see if that brings him out.
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