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He wont even hug or kiss me, so why does he expect me to have sex with him?

Tagged as: Dating, Sex, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (18 May 2010) 4 Answers - (Newest, 3 June 2010)
A female Australia age 41-50, anonymous writes:

I am 27 and my boyfriend is 29. We got to know each other in office for one month before becoming an item. Now we are together for 3 months.

During the one month of courtship, the chemistry was great and we started holding hands from time to time when we went out. After the one month, I decided to ask him whether we are now in a relationship. I wanted to be clear about this. His replied that he did not think of this question before, and why dont we just let it flow. I was upset and told him i want it to be clear, letting it flow sounds like this is an open relationship with no commitment involved. It after showing that i am extremely upset that he sms me the nest day saying that he would like me to be his gf. This was how our relationship started.

This is my first relationship and according to him, his 4th. He is a very physical person. He doesnt initiate to hug or kiss me, but is always telling me that he wants sex. I have told him many times that i am not ready, and that we are only together for a month and i do not believe in engaging in sex so early in a relationship.

He kept saying that i am his girlfriend, there is nothing wrong, his ex all had sex with him, and he will be abnormal if he does not want sex. Then he said he doesnt need full sex, juz blow job will do.

I feel so weird, he does not even hug or kiss me, how do i bring myself to blow him or even have sex with him?

Things start to get even weirder. There was once he was driving, and he started to unzip and took out his pxxxs. He asked me to blow it. I was very shock and did not do what he wanted. He looked unhappy but did not force me. This happened around 3 times already. Lately it got worse, he suddenly drove to a carpark, unzipped and asked me for it again. It was broad daylight with people walking around. It was until someone parked in front of us that he gave up. But he got upset and shouted that im anti climax.

Is he just a normal guy with raging hormones or someone who just cant wait to bed me and then leave me? Minus all the sexual stuff, he does talk to me daily over the phone for around 1 hr. Our meet ups have reduced from 3 times per wk to just once per wk.

View related questions: blow-job, his ex

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2010):

Your guy sounds like a complete asshole. If he really cared about you, he would respect your decision to wait and certainly would not get angry when you said no. Dump him, and do it now, girl. You deserve a man, not a horney man-child.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (20 May 2010):

When a man meets someone he thinks is special and with whom he is interested in having a relationship, he is willing to let her set the pace. He would not want to blow his chances of a relationship. If he meets someone he wants sex with he makes his intensions known by his actions not words.

He took a chance when he exposed himself that you would walk. He wasn't concerned that you would like he would be for someone he felt was special. He probably figured nothing ventured nothing gained. If you walked he would go on to the next one.

Show some self resect and walk away.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (18 May 2010):

He's a creep. Run away from this relationship as fast as you can!

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A female reader, GettingHelp South Africa +, writes (18 May 2010):

I'd smack him. Honestly I would.

Do NOT sleep with him, do NOT blow him.

That JERK had better start treating you right ASAP otherwise I suggest you walk out the door.

He wants the physical stuff, nothing more. He wants (and I'm sorry this is harsh) to treat you like his free prozzie.

He wouldn't commit to a relationship, all he wants is sex and blow job. Move on from him.

Did you know that sex therapists won't kiss their clients because they consider it too emotionally attaching? But they will have sex with their clients.

He doesn't want an emotional connection with you, move on from this JERK and find someone who will treat you right.

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