A
female
age
,
*ngelfish
writes:My Husband went to work 2 weeks ago and has never come back. We've been married 14 months and I really didn't see this coming. I cracked my hip in Feb and it has left me with back problems. 3 weeks ago I was admitted to hospital again and when the nurse rang him up he told her he could't come to the hospital yet as he was busy at work! He's never really got on with my 11yr old son and it's been a difficult 3 and a half yrs. He won't speak to me, he got his friend to collect his things and he's started the divorce. The house I live in is mine as I owned it before we met, thankfully. I can't stop crying, I go to work come home and can't function properly. I don't want to eat and I can't sleep. I'm 46 and feel so low as he told me I would never meet anyone else at my age. I have no family or friends and feel so alone and abandoned. How do I get over this? Thanks X
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female
reader, angelfish +, writes (22 September 2008):
angelfish is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell, went to work and got home to find he had a spare key to my car and took his sat nav out, whilst there he found a key. He must have guessed I changed my front door locks and came to the house and took the T.V, dvd player and some other things! I can't believe I left my spare key in the glove box of my car, but then again I didn't know he had a spare set of keys to my car. I phoned him, the first contact since he left 17 days ago, and he just said I ruined the marriage and all his friends are now commenting on how happy he looks. He looks happy and I'm a crying wreck still. My heart is well and truly broken and I must admit I had really dark thoughts earlier on but my 11yr old needs his Mum. He's getting his friend to collect the rest of his things and has started the divorce. At this moment in time I can't see any glimmer of light at the end of this never ending tunnel.
A
female
reader, angelfish +, writes (21 September 2008):
angelfish is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThe replies I have received have been positive. I can only take things one hour at a time at the moment as I'm still so sad. I know there is a good life out there, I just hope I can find it. X
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 September 2008): To Spirit Of Iona..Thankyou for your reply, you are so right. Night time is so sad being all alone with just memories. I know things will get easier but it's good to read people reassuring me. God Bless you all.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 September 2008): This sounds very much like one of those occasions when children are the wedge that drives a couple apart, which you probably can't do much about.
Practically, you need to get yourself a solicitor to act on your behalf unless the two of you are able to come to an amicable mutually agreed 'splitting up of the spoils' settlement. But bear in mind you might be entitled to more than he might offer, and a solicitor will point out to you what that might be.
At 46 you won't have any problem finding someone else if you want to. You've got a lot more years ahead of you than you might think. I was 46 once, and it seems an awful long time ago. I started afresh at the age of 52, and there's no reason on earth that you couldn't do the same, especially as you're a lot younger than I was!
Keep your chin up and try to concentrate on the practical aspects rather than the emotional ones. Rather than be stuck in the house, go and join a local club - I'd personally recommend a sub-aqua club, but that's only because it's something I enjoy. You might too. Google BS-AC for details.
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