A
female
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*reamer6311
writes: I finally started going out with this boy who I liked for a couple months. We seemed to really connect; we hung out a lot and always laughed and smiled when we were together. But best of all is that we could talk about anything together, including our personal lives. I was unlike girls he dated in the past, who were rather slutty and hardcore partiers. But everyone who knew this boy said he was a good person and could tell he was really into me.Then after two weeks, he broke up with me out of the blue. He said that he thought I was beautiful and amazing and really really liked me. But then he told me that he had a lot of problems with his family and that he was mixed up in certain activities, such as drinking and smoking. I knew about this from what others have told me, but he never actually drank or smoked in front of me. I never did any of that stuff and had no desire to, so we differed greatly in that aspect. He said that if we continued in this relationship, both of us would get hurt and he didn't "feel right about being with me." I assumed he didn't want to corrupt me with his own problems.Then the next day I talked to him again. He told me that he didn't have feelings for me more than as a friend which totally did not make sense with everything he said the day before. Now he is completely avoiding me, and I don't know what to do. I still really like him, but I'm just so confused about his feelings for me. Does he still like me and is trying to push me away so as not to hurt me? Or is he being honest about not liking me more than as a friend? What do I do now that he is avoiding me? Help! I'm so confused...
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 November 2006): According to what you write here, he is being pretty clear about his reasons for not seeing you, and telling you that he just wants to be friends now means he is trying to break off the possibility of romance. He may not be telling you everything you need to know, however. My guess when you say how different you are, and the kind of partying girls he hung out with in the past and how you are not that type, he may have a drug problem and knows you would not approve. He may like you very much, but knows that you would not really want to be with him if you knew about his activities.
Just a hunch, I could be wrong, but I would not pine away for this one, you like him, but you don't really know him that well and he is probably all wrong for you....so just give him his space and don't worry about why he is avoiding you, he may talk to you later after he is over his feelings that were developing for you. I know you are dissapointed, but be dissapointed in him and not yourself because I think you are probably amazing just as he said.
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