A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Around 6 months ago I started dating a great guy who lives around 2.5 hours away from me. I was crazy about him, and he seemed crazy about me as well. He asked about dating exclusively early on and made it very clear he was looking for something long-term. He drove out to see me often, we had great conversations (he called everyday), amazing chemistry, and very compatible life goals. A little short of two months in he broke things off citing the distance as the problem. The weird thing was that despite how early on in the relationship we were I am fairly certain he was testing the waters to say "I love you" the week before he ended things.My plan all along has been to move to the area he lives (where I am originally from) five months from now, and he knew that. About two months ago (after a little over 4 months of not having any contact) he contacted me and was asking about when I was moving back and talking about missing me and wanting to get back together. I've seen him once since then in person and it was clear that he wanted to get back together once I move.I'm torn about what to do about this. I'm crazy about him, and part of me feels like if we wait five months and he's still interested that will be re-assuring to me, and that it's more likely to work out if we wait and are in the same city. However, part of me also feels like I don't want to be put on the back burner like that, and it makes me wonder how much he really does care about me even though when we are together it's clear that he's very into me (and no I'm not talking about him trying to get physical with me, which he has not tried post-breakup). So, should I write the whole thing off, tell him it's now or never, or tell him we'll have to see where we are in five months? (I don't see agreeing to get back together in five months as an option because that's just odd.) He also wants to see each other occasionally in the meantime, and I'm not sure how to handle that. It's fun to see him, but I just don't want to add to the confusion of the situation.
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (16 April 2012):
 I would not make any arrangements to pick up where you left off when you move there. Not with this guy.
It barely lasted 2 months. And out of the blue came the " I can't date you because of the distance"... Honestly, I would let this guy go. You can do better, and you deserve better.
I would venture a guess that it wasn't really the distance that broke you two up, but a local girl maybe? And when they broke up he decided to see if you are available again.. Seems like the kind of guy who doesn't want to put too much effort into a relationship. It has to be convenient FOR HIM.
He wants to see you "occasionally" up til your move? WTH? Do you really feel that his actions and treatment of you is OK?
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