A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I do not know what to do... my boyfiend wants sex all the time but I do not and I do not want to do it all the time. Please can people give me some help? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2011): my gf and i had the same problem although we never really had sex, we role played over texts and instant messenger and actually did in the role play but never actual penetration as im only 16 by 2 months and shes only 15 by a month. she told me how it made her feel and i told her we wouldnt do it anymore because i loved her too much to push her through that and we havent since. but she also let us get a little more physical when we were alone together, we havent got to touching down there or full blown sex but we did get a lot more physical. so just ask him to slow it down at least a little and tell him how it makes you feel. if he loves you he should slow down but you will have to compromise with him a little bit at least.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2011): I am in the same position, my bf wants it more than me as he has more experience and is older but all I did was talk it over with him and explained tht I did enjoy when we have sex but I do not want it as regularly as him and he understood this and he is now willing to just have sex when I am ready to have it. So if your partner loves you enough he will respect what you have to say and you should be able to find middle ground where you both agree tht it will work. And if he doesn't u need to think is he really the man for you? Hope this helps you :) x
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A
female
reader, cat lady  +, writes (6 January 2011):
 You simply may not enjoy doing it as much as he does and that's that. Sexual desire can't be rushed; it comes and goes throughout life, depending upon your health, your hormones or just your disposition. You might have more important things in mind, too. After all, we didn't build modern civilization by staying in bed all the time and if your boyfriend doesn't know that, perhaps he's not quite bright enough to continue to interest you..in case you never thought of it that way. Is that your real age? If that's the case, have you considered that maybe you shouldn't be having these kind of relationships at all? If you're unhappy enough about your situation to have found the bravery to ask for help, it's likely you are being abused. You are being bullied into doing things you don't want to do. Sex isn't just a toy; we are even able to bring new life into the world with it! Something so powerful as that should be dealt with respectfully by people who respect each other.I don't know how much interest you have in the history of your country (you're young yet and have plenty of time to get better acquainted with it) but a lot of women chained themselves to government buildings and even died in prison to protect your prerogative to say NO to abuses from men. They gave you a vote, a right to keep your own children, to your own property and a right to defend yourself, even against your own husband, if necessary. Letting someone treat you like a blow-up doll with no human rights is rather an insult to their memory, don't you think? Say NO when you feel like it and follow it up with whatever force it takes to get your point across.
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A
female
reader, angelDlite +, writes (6 January 2011):
 hi
is he the same age as you? teenage lads are typically like this, its all the hormones. don't do anything you don't want to do. respect his feelings by explaining to him that you just don't want to do it as often as he does but he has got nothing to worry about coz you still love him etc, and he should also respect you enough to accept that. if you go along with what he wants every time i would imagine that sex will become a like a chore and you may end up resenting him. is sex quite new to him? maybe its the novelty factor at the moment so he might calm down a bit when he gets more settled with you
xx
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2011): Compromise.
If he wants it five times a week and you want it once a week, agree to have sex three times a week.
If that doesn't work and he is left unsatisfied or you are left feeling used or exhausted then you guys are not sexually compatible and you need to think seriously about the relationship.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2011): I am going to tell you what I would tell my 16 year old daughter. DUH!!! A 16 boy wants to have sex all the time. What a revalation. If you don't like feeling like a unpaid whore then stop having sex. You are engaging in a mature activity when neither of you have the maturity to deal with the issue. I get it you need to feel loved and wanted but having sex is not the exclusive way of showing you love someone. You are 16. Enjoy being 16. There truly are guys out there that will like you for who you are not how much you put out. If you cannot find someone like that then it is time to make a change. Find new friends that don't judge you on you sexual endeavors. Go to church functions. Do some volunteer work after school. Be the catalyst in your future. If YOU are unhappy then look to YOU to change your situation. You are the most influential person in your life. Don't be a follower.
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A
female
reader, Miamine +, writes (6 January 2011):
 16-17, make sure you arrange activities outside the house.. movies, ice-skating, swimming.
Unfortunately this will probably make you tired and make him more horny. But it's important for your relationship to be based on more than sex, you need to do things together so you build memories and shared interests.
I'm assuming sex between you and him is new... he likes it, he likes you so he wants to do all the time. Sex is a lot of fun, but it's also tiring.
It's your right to say NO to sex if you don't want it. Slow him down with "hand jobs" and "oral sex". If your sex drives are so different, you may have to suggest that he masturbate without you sometimes and allow you to get some rest.
A nice boyfriend should be understanding.
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A
male
reader, kenny + ♥, writes (6 January 2011):
 Its just sometimes happens like that when one partner wants sex more than the other one. All you can do really is find a good moment, when you are both relaxed and just stress to him how you are feeling, If he is a really nice guy he will respect your decision and be patient with you. If he dosen't respect what you are saying then you have to question whether or not he is for you.
Good luck
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