A
female
age
36-40,
*lessedwith2
writes:i have been with my boyfriend for almost 4 years. i had a month old son when we got together, who is now 3, and he has raised him as his own. how awesome is he right? ... we also have a 2 year old daughter together. well of course we have had our ups and downs and have financially struggled. and have had our struggles through having kids, work, stress, and sex. well it comes to the point where i dont know what to do about my boyfriend. he says hes tired, stressed, or sore from working all day... so sex is limited to about once every week average. well to me that feels like a MONTH!! it drives me nuts! i am the type of person who is once every two-three days and he says that he just cant keep up. and hes in better shape than me!! i am 23 and he is 24. i hear that mens prime age is 18???? does that maybe have something to do with it? usually he calls me a few times during the day while he is at work to see how i am doing [bc i am a stay at home mom] which i think is sweet. but i just cant keep living with the arguments and then failed sex attempts. it seems like we dont have sex, i get frustrated, irritated, and then finally a few days into my struggle to not jump on him [bc he will just tell me NO] i get mad. and complain and try to talk to him about it and he just gets all worked up and yells or tells me what i stated above. then he tries to have sex with me bc i am not pleased with him and it is a failed attempt and feels like hes forcing himself so i am unsatisfied... then it starts the cycle all over again..... what can i do to get us back on track or should i just call it quits???
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2009): thanks that makes a lot of sense. youve pointed out obvious things i was being blind too.
A
male
reader, shodogg +, writes (10 August 2009):
 Aside from him being tired from working all day, how is his nutritional intake? Are you feeding your man the right food to replenish his "essence? You mention you're a stay-at-home wife/mom,then is your day spent being more "mental" or more "physical". The reasons I ask are many-fold, one: he really is depleted from working all day especially without a proper diet. Two, your energy level seems to run circles around his. It takes energy and "stamina" to get and maintain an erection, and not to mention an "attractiveness". Yes, that's right, an attractive (any)woman will get your hubby up in no time. Men are caught by the site of beauty. So only you can know for sure if you've falling from grace a little? My point is, you need to grab this thing (situation) by the horns and freaking go all-out on it. Fix yourself up, hair, makeup, perfume, gym, and last of all but not least, find a way to get out the house with kids in tow and get around to socializing. Sounds like you can use a "mind-scape", so go out and tire yourself out and come exhausted. Then from there you will begin to develop your own revelations and ideas to entreat both your hubby and yourself.
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