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female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: My ex and I have dated for one and a half years and were very much into each other during the time. We were both each other's first loves, but sex was always a big issue in our relationship, because I wasn't ready and he was. Eight months into the relationship, he left for college and things started to change dramatically. He ended up cheating on me and "falling in love" with another girl, whom he got pregnant. After he confronted me about it, he said he had only been with her because she was pregnant, but still wanted somethin with me in the future, but then later claimed that he was happy with her. I was hurt and devastated and told him to leave me alone, and he did for two months. After the two months were up, he would tell me that he still had feelings for me and that "she" was crazy and he would often text or call perodically, but then say that he just wanted to be friends with me. I have told him NUMEROUS times that I cant be friends with someone I'm not over, but he just isn't getting it. I feel bad for ignoring him, but I know that if I start talkin to him again, my feelings will come back. What should I do? and why does he still want to remain friends?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2006): Listen I agree witht the other person guys are duche bags - lol! I wouldnt have used those words but she is right. They are 100% selfish all of them selfish I promise you. And he is obviously not caring that you still have ffeelings and this is hard for you. He just wants what works for him! Keep ignoring him dont feel bad. He didnt feel bad for you while he was cheating on you! He doesnt feel bad that you are still hurting and prefer not to talk to him. Dont give in I promise there are better men out there. Hold your standards high please and find a respectful man. Although I am having a hard time myself but I will never settle. I know how it hurts I just got over someone myself and getting over them even hurts I am sad that i no longer wanna be with him - lol! But I know I deserved better more or the man I dreamt of! Be strong mama!
A
female
reader, Ivanna22 +, writes (18 December 2006):
 You're doing a good job by ignoring him. DO NOT start talking to him again. What he did was stupid. He cheated on you and there's no reason for you to talk to someone who does not respect you, even if you're already over him. He's a jerk and I suggest you to tell him to leave you alone. I'm sure he doesn't just want to be friends with you. I think he wants something more. DO NOT get back with him. Once a cheater, always a cheater and if he really loved you he wouldn't have disrespected you. Keep ignoring him, move on and find a guy who really loves you and won't cheat on you. That's so aweful that he did that to you. What an ass whole. He should've just broken up with you first instead of cheating. Guys are a bunch of douche bags.
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A
female
reader, Nikita  +, writes (18 December 2006):
 Hello, well it sounds like he wants to have his cake and eat it because he's trying to string both of you along and its not fair to you, or to her.I think you should ignore his calls and texts and dont talk to him until he's grown up a little. He's got a baby to consider in all of this too and seems to forget that. If he's quick to slag the mother of his child off then he doesnt sound much cop to me. He's hurt you badly and is still hurting you by not respecting your wishes and leaving you alone until you feel that you can talk to him without experiencing the hurt. He wants to remain friends with you because he either feels that he wants to keep his options open just in case the other girl doesnt work out or he's feeling guilty and doesnt know what he wants.. He didnt respect you enough either when you were together as regards to sex if he wasnt prepared to wait until you were ready. I think you're much better off without him. You need time to be on your own and with your friends and to work through the pain he's caused. Dont let him sway you and maybe if you ignore him he'll get the message. Hope this helps. Take care and have a great xmas okayx
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