A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:*Sigh* Do you know anyone who looks/acts older than their age? Well I'm one of those kids. I'm 14 years old about to turn 15 on Saturday. Not to brag, but I'm more mature than people in my age group. I think its because I was abused and shifted from house to house during my younger years. I never had a stable home, my mother left me for 5 years and my family mistreated me and so forth. So because of this, I had to take care of myself. However, that's not the point. A while back I lost my virginity to this boy I love dearly. We've been going out for two years. I do a lot for him, not over the top though, I know when to stop. Basically, the deal is he thought I was 16 years old about to turn 17 on Saturday when I'm really turning 15!! I told him the truth yesterday, I had to send him an IM because I didn't want to hear the disappointment in his voice. I told him its okay to break up with me, but he says "I still love you though, why did you do this?" Unfortunately, I can't answer that question...but I never meant to hurt him in anyway. It sucks, because now I don't feel comfortable around him. Its almost as if I have to TRY to be older and not myself because of the simple fact that he knows my REAL AGE now.Plus every time he has sex with me it is statutory rape. But I love him, and he says he loves me. He has cheated on me one time, but I took him back. If I need someone to talk to he's there. If I need a shoulder to cry on, I can always lean on him. He's just all I have right now. My mom and I don't get along to the point where she calls the cops on me, I hang out with people older than my age. Its stressful just facing ONE day in school. So I don't go. I go to counseling but it doesn't really help. I want a job to support myself. I feel like I'm not loved by anyone....my boyfriend is all I've got. What should I do?...Please give me some advice, my life is falling apart.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2007): You state you act older then your age of 14 but not going to school is a sure sign it is all an act. Being mature is understanding that you have a tomorrow to plan for and being completely consumed in today's boyfriend problems just shows how young you really are. Go back to school show your maturity and even if it is not easy get yourself a future. The boy stuff will all work out in the end if you fulfill your personal potential.
A
male
reader, seph  +, writes (6 December 2007):
I would suggest that you are emotionally insecure from what yu have written in your question. I don't mean that as an insult. You probably look to a boyfriend as a form of companionship and to feel good about yourself. At your age its okay to be alone. You have the whole of your late teens, twenties and thirties ahead of you to worry about dating.
The fact you misled this guy was wrong but no big deal. Don't keep having sex with him because if you guys get caught he could go to jail.
Look for comfort in friends and not with your bf. Hope that helps
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A
female
reader, jea49 +, writes (6 December 2007):
Fourteen is alittle youg for being in love, but i do understand your situation. I was fourteen when i started dating guys. In answer to your question I feel really bad for you that you have gone through so much and as a result grew up much faster than others. I don't think they consider it statory rape at age 17 but you can check that out. I don't see where you all of a sudden feel that you need to act older, you said you were more mature for your age. so you 've been together for 2 years now. you and your boyfriend should be comfortable enough with each other to work the age difference out. Please try to remember everything in your life does not need to be based on a relationship. Please seek out the counseling and give it another chance maybe even see a pastor from your local church. You sound like you have a few insecurity issues. you really need to love yourself first before searching for it in a relationship. you are loved by god! i wil keep you in my prayers.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2007): Yes i've heard this before. I am also one of those people, more mature than others their age and it so happens that this same thing happened to a friend of mine not long ago: she told a boy she was older than she really was.
The best thing to tell him is that you liked him and that you didnt think he'd want to go out with someone so young. This means that you did it for love, the best reason really. He has already reassured you that he still loves you, so try your best to be YOU around him.
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