A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Is it normal to be texting the opposite sex everyday if you are attached? My bf has been texting a female friend everyday for the past month and she sends him her selfies a few times a week. Although the photos are not sexual, I do feel uncomfortable at how many selfies she sends him (there's probably more than 20 in the past month) I told him I felt uncomfortable, and asked him to delete her photos but he didn't want to because he is "lazy". Am I being unreasonable?
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female
reader, MSA +, writes (16 November 2014):
Here's an approach you can consider:
Take selfies of you and your boyfriend when you both are on dates, eating, cuddling at home, etc. ask your boyfriend to return the favor when she sends her selfies to him by sending a selfie of you both.
If you happen to be there while your boyfriend is texting with her, use your boyfriend's phone to type a reply to her, say 'Hi I'm "your name", your selfie looks cool!" Or reply to whatever she just texted. Or both you and your boyfriend can send a voice message to her together.
I'm not saying to do this ALL THE TIME, but once in a while. This should make you feel more comfortable with their friendship!
Hope it works out!
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (16 November 2014):
What you're being "unreasonable" about is not having kicked him to the curb, yet..... AND asking here, in your convuluted way, for justification to do so.....
Wake up!!!!! Good luck...
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2014): While it is absolutely fine to have friends of the opposite sex, and be in touch with them - that female friend is crossing a line. He is young and most likely still very immature, and this is most likely not going to be the love of your life. She most likely has a crush on him and is reminding him if just how wonderful she is by sending frequent selfies. If he can't see that it's really quite disrespectful to your relationship then don't bother being with him. Then he is free to share images with whoever he likes.
Of course in relationships there might sometimes be someone who tries to interfere, but a guy that's worth it will make it quite clear he's not interested in that.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2014): I agree with you OP. Why does she need to send him 20 selfies a month. It's not Halloween everyday. She is advertising her looks to him. Ofcourse they can be friends but she doesn't need to point out her looks. And hr shouldn't be entertaining it.
They're both immature and that's only something that comes with time.
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A
female
reader, WhenCowsAttack +, writes (16 November 2014):
You are very young, so I am not surprised that you have this completely false expectation that friends of the opposite sex suddenly should be shunned because one becomes involved in a relationship.
Apparently you've read the texts and there is no inappropriate content, so what's the problem?
The problem seems to be that you are very insecure and jealous. That is something YOU need to work on. The sick feeling of jealousy isn't fun. Why put yourself through it?
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