A
female
age
36-40,
*ustagal
writes:my 5 yrs bf doesnt giv me any time, he is alws bz with his jo or band. we meet only once a week n that leads to sex in his apt. now a days he calls me only once a day. but he is also pushing me to get married. but he alws takes me for granted , nvr giv me priority ovr anything. im so confused ! sud i marry him! what if he keep on neglecting me afterwards? im just so lost. he says if we get married we wont have the issue of seeing eachother. but i say its not abt only seeing each other, whers the connection!. i rly love him, i think he does too. i realy wana make things btr. plz help me sm1 :( Reply to this Question
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female
reader, BunnyTee  +, writes (23 May 2010):
 1. If he takes you for granted now, what is there to say that'll change after you're married?
2. If you're not included in his hobbies, or whatever, now, see above.
Getting married *may* alter the seeing eachother thing, but I'd bet heavily that it won't completely alter or cure points 1 or 2.
Sit him down, look him dead in the eye and tell him what you've stated here. If he genuinely cares for you, he'll find a way to prioritize, if not, then there is no good reason to marry this guy.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2010): I think you need to tell him how you feel!!
If you don't want to get married then don't! It's a big step, tell him you want to see things change if he wants to get married
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