A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My male friend and I were supposed to just be going out for drinks this Friday night, but he asked me if I wanted to go out for a meal before that too. Do you think it's a date? He hasn't said whether it is or not. I feel nervous about having dinner though. We went out for drinks last week too. He kept putting his arm around me and winked at me and when people assumed that we were a couple, he didn't say that we were just friends. And when we were leaving, he gave me a hug. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (21 February 2017):
 So how did the date go?
A
male
reader, Phil052 +, writes (20 February 2017):
 Great news and I guess reading between the lines that the date went well! Best wishes for your future together!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2017): It WAS a date!! ?. Thanks everyone for your help and advice! ?. The night before we went out, he blocked his exes number on his phone as she kept trying to argue with him.
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A
male
reader, Phil052 +, writes (18 February 2017):
This is a difficult one, given his contact with his ex. I suggest you tell him about your concerns about this. See what he says! x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2017): I told him that some things are bothering me but didn't say what they are yet. I'm not meeting up with him as long as he is in contact with his ex. They only dated for two months and broke up in August. It's weird.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2017): Well if this isn't a date, I don't know what is!!
Men, in my experience, rarely hang out with women unless there's some interest there. How long have you been friends?
I also don't think that men encourage physical contact and flirt in this manner (arms around you and winking) unless they want more.
I have a male friend who only has female friends except for one male friend and I've seen him with his female friends. They are exactly that ....friends. I couldn't imagine him behaving in this way with them, he treats them as if they were his sisters.
I think the others have got it wrong. It could be me who's wrong though, so take it as it comes. Enjoy it and if you fancy HIM, flirt a little yourself and see where it goes. Have fun and good luck x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2017): I am thinking of cancelling. I am too nervous, anxious not knowing whether it's a date, anxious about my appearance and about eating in public, and anxious because he told me that he still talks to his ex girlfriend but he wanted to stop talking to her as they always argue. If he wasn't still interested in her, he wouldn't be speaking to her would he?.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (16 February 2017):
 Yes he likes you. Even if it's not really a date ,... you can turn it into one. Go get him , tiger :)
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2017): Just wanted to add that he puts smiley faces on his texts and when we got home the other night he texted me until 2.30 in the morning and sent me another text at 8.15 that morning to say good morning and asked how I was.
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A
male
reader, Phil052 +, writes (16 February 2017):
Given that you want to date him, and he seems pretty keen, then Friday should be interesting! It's just how you play it, as it hasn't been officially declared a 'date'. I would be a bit flirty and see how things go! Enjoy! x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2017): I agree with honeypie... I don't think it's a date. Would you like to date him?
He obviously don't mind that people might think you're a couple so that's a good thing.
Yup not a date, I don't think.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2017): I just want to add that yes, I do want to date him.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (15 February 2017):
 Ask him?
I would PRESUME it's NOT a date. Him putting his arm around you and even the wink doesn't mean anything MORE than him trying to make you feel comfortable, he probably noticed and sensed you were a little nervous. It's what SOME people do to let a friend know things are A-OK.
Everyone has to eat, so having a meal with a friend before going out for a drink sounds kinda like a normal thing for friends to do.
I think the problem is YOU want more than friendship and you don't know if he wants more or HOW to talk to him about it.
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A
male
reader, Phil052 +, writes (15 February 2017):
Ooh! I would say, yes! He's subtlety moving it into date territory. How do you feel about it? You didn't indicate whether you wanted to date him or not, but it might be time to consider this, before Friday!
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