A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i was friends with this boy last year but we dont really talk anymore. well, when i say friends, we had to sit together in a lesson but ive never really liked him, although he's always had a bit of a 'thing' for me - flirting, trying to hold hands, although for part of the time he had a girlfriend which i thought was out of order so i told him to respect her. trouble is, he recently bought me a christmas present and gave it to my friend to give to me... and she wasnt supposed to tell me who it was from, however obviously she did. he'd written this long freaky message inside about how im all he wants for xmas (puke) etc, and i dont know what to do!? because im not supposed to know it was from him, yet i know i wont be able to look at him anymore :S i really dont like him like that, and to be honest i dont particularly like him at all! :( advice?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 December 2010): Of course he knows you know it was him who gave it to you, guys know girls tell each other these things. So, he did it 'anonymously' to see how you'd react. If you don't want to be his Christmas present then SMS or ring him and say 'hey, thanks for the gift, I hope you were joking in that message? if not sorry but i don't really feel the same way.'
or something...
best to tell him quickly and don't draw it out into a massive thing. OR, ignore it and assume he'll get the message. Or if you want to play his game get your friend to give him a note from you that says 'thanks but no thanks' ('anonymous'...)
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 December 2010): Just tell him you don't want to be in a relationship with him. If you don't like him at all, just be nice and let him down. You don't need to say "I am not attracted to you at all". It's usually best to not try to steamroller (is that the word I want) people's confidence. He seems sweet, but if you think tooooo sweet, thank him for the gift, his thoughtfulness, but he is just not right for you.
Try not to puke in his face.
Love, Tante Vic
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A
male
reader, Sex_counsellor +, writes (19 December 2010):
 It is clear that this guy is interested in you and obviously thinks that things may possibly work out. If you are not interested at all then you do need to make this clear to him as it is unfair to string him along.Tell him that you know it is from him and although he is likely to deny it, just politely say that it was a very sweet idea and it was really nice however you have no intentions on any relationship with him and that you are not attracted to him at all. Just be honest, this can be done and although may seem harsh if you are polite he shouldn't be too offended.
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