A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Ok there is this guy that I've been dating for 6 months he is very nice and we have our problems but we always fix them and we connect on a big level..Ok there is this just one problem he is obsessed with money he is divorced and has 2 kids so at the beginning of the month 60% of his income is gone he works hard so hard that sometimes he doesn't ring me for 2 days and its kinda hard for me he is also a shopoholic so he just can't seem to stop buying stuff which leaves him broke by the middle of the month and that makes him grumpy..Every month somewhere in the middle he asks me for a loan like to buy petrol or something...he always pays back but I don't know it seems like to much I feel a bit outnumbered like his work and money is more important to him then me.. but then on the upside he is very caring when its the beginning of the month he is fresh and happy and relaxed he spends a lot of time with me. so what do u think?
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female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (10 January 2011):
I agree. Is his shopping habits really bad? Maybe it could actually be some sort of addiction that he may need help from, he has came out of a marriage and maybe he dealt with that by over spending. Talk to him about it be open and honest but dont make it look like you are judging him. Just say to him that although you always get your money back from him that you are worried about his spending habits and how he would be able to cope if you couldnt lend him money. Tell him you are there for him to listen if he needs it or to help him organise a rota where he schedules what he spends and puts money behind for essential things like petrol and food.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (10 January 2011):
Honestly, he doesn't seem like a "keeper" - he obviously have poor self control when it comes to spending and a LOT of baggage. Could be his shopping sprees is his way of "self medicating" a depression.
I think if you can you should talk to him. Tell him how you feel.
If a guy can't save money for his gas (petrol) how is he going to save ti for anything else? Now and in the future? Of course it's his money, but .............. he seems to rely on you for money too.
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