A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: i just turned 19 years old and im dating a guy that i met over the internet who is 36 years old. there are a few problems here he thinks im 20 but also he is a very sexual person which is ok with me but how do i make sure that's not all he wants. he's also talking about moving in together. i just dont know what to do with the age difference can anyone give me some advice please.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 March 2007): You want to know if this guy is into you and not just after sex right?
Don't have sex with him.
If he stays its you he wants. If he goes its about sex.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 March 2007): ok I am a 53 yr old woman---I got married at age 16--he was 24....we got along pretty good with an age difference of 7.5 yrs. but you guys are 16 yrs apart. I think this is a big age spread...sometimes it can work but most of the time it doesnt. I wouldnt worry about him thinking you are 20 when 19--that is only one yr.......
i guess I would wait to move in with him, at least 1 yr. find out if you are truly compatible and able to make the age gap work or not.
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A
female
reader, Midge +, writes (27 March 2007):
Thats quite an age difference, but its not the end of the world either. Although its natural to think about things like that since he has been an active man for somewhat longer than you.
Firstly, you need to be straight with him about your age. He'll probably be okay with it!
Secondly, theres no way of knowing if he just wants you for your youth and sex. Perhaps having a heart to heart talk with him? When there is such a big gap in age, you'll probably find that the same things you have been thinking of, he is thinking too. He too is probably sitting there thinking, "I hope she doesnt think I want just one thing".
I went through the same thing with my boyfriend. He is 10 years older than me and I never thought I would fall for a guy who was that much older than me. At first I was thinking about the same things you were. Is he just wanting me because I'm young, engergetic and sex? I decided to broach the subject one day and to my amazement, he was thinking about the same thing too! I met him on the internet too and when we did decided to meet, it was love at first sight!
Speak to him! See where he is at and if you are not comfortable with what he says, then you have to make some decisions.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 March 2007): You don't know whether all he wants is sex or not. Only as you continue to date and get to know one another will you find that out - and of course being able to discuss freely and honestly concerning what you both want in a relationship.
You should tell him your real age, for starters. And, you should not be thinking of moving in together just yet unless you have been dating for at least a year.
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