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He says he only wants me for sex. Should I keep on, in the hope he falls in love with me eventually?

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Question - (21 July 2008) 3 Answers - (Newest, 21 July 2008)
A female Ireland age , *eadowsweet writes:

My best friend has been married for 17 yrs an i have been in love with him for 18. Finally his wife chucked him and we started sleepin together he says i'm his best friend an he says its the best sex he's ever had but he says he only wants sex an no relationship, then i told him i was in love with him -and he said he was flattered but needs to be single to get over wifey, do u think i can ever win him, shld i keep shaggin him in the hope he falls in love with me one day or just forget him?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2008):

I cannot not tell you if he would fall in love with you or not;

BUT

I can tell you whilst you are giving him sex with "no Strings" attached; you have almost "no chance", if any to get this to turn into a more serious or permanent relationship;

I suggest:

You stop being the friend with the "benefits";

There must be mutual feelings of love and respect; if not, he is using you; How can he respect you? NO, you have to STOP the benefits immediately; sure be friends if you so wish, BUT NO SEX;

Only then will you be able to establish if this guy was just after the SEX or if he had any feelings for you;

HOWEVER

I know you are not going to like this, BUT, I am saying this to try and help you; not to hurt or upset you;

I f this guy had any feelings for you; or respected you; to my opinion he would not use and abuse you for sex;

I suggest you take "Stock"; think about yourself: You DESERVE the best; this guy is not offering it to you;

You should be with somebody that loves you; cares for you; respects you; this guy is not offering you any of that.

THis is not the material and the basis for a longterm good and healthy relationship;

BUT

you need to decide what you want from life and from a relationship;

DON'T settle for second best; put your dreams and yourself first;

I know this might be difficult,BUT think of yourself and your needs and wants; do not allow this guy to use you sexually;

You DESERVE better;

Get out there find a guy who can love you; respect you and with whom you can have a loving relationship.

Best wishes and lots of SMILES

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A female reader, eyeswideopen United States +, writes (21 July 2008):

eyeswideopen agony auntYou are wasting precious time.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2008):

Generally speaking, a man says exactly what he means. No hidden agendas or reading between the lines like women tend to do. Black is black and white is white. No grey areas.

What he's telling you is that he thoroughly enjoys having sex with you, but as far as any meaningful relationship is concerned - forget it!

With that knowledge it's up to you whether you keep on shaggin' him in the knowledge that's all he sees in you - shaggin'.

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