A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Me and my on again off again bf of 8 years are having a baby together. I am currently 7 months pregnant. We got back together officially in the begining he moved in with me. Then when I was 5 months pregnant he broke up with me citing that he was in love with a girl he had been dating prior to my pregancy. I kicked him out of my house but I realized that I had to maintain some sort of relationship with him due to our baby. About two weeks after the break up he offered to move back in to help with rent and so someone would be with me due to the pregnancy. So since he has moved back in he treats me like his gf even though I believe he is engaged to this other girl. He talks about our future and us raising our child together he and even mentioned marraige to me. She doesn't know he is living with me and doesn't want him to talk to me about anything other than baby. He spends most of his time with me. Im so confused. Who does he want to be with me or her?
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female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (16 January 2008):
 He cannot give up either one of you and is now sitting on the fence until one of you decide enough is enough.
That is the situation as he sees it.
Will you accept half a man or none at all?
A
female
reader, O Connor  +, writes (15 January 2008):
 my guess is he wants both of you - and both of the lives he leads wen he is with both of you. i know you want him to be with you and have a family but it doesnt always work like that. i think you need to kick him out, and make it clear to him that he is only the baby's father...nothing more. i know that may be hard, but after wat he has done to you i dont see any reason why you could trust him. im sorry if any of this sounds harsh hun, but your in such a vulnerable place and you need to stand up for yourself!if you need someone to talk to email me xxx
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A
male
reader, Ponungalungb +, writes (15 January 2008):
 If he decided when you were 5 months pregnant that he was in love with someone else, you did the right thing and kicked him out. Unfortunately, you didn't keep him kicked out. You don't have to keep any kind of relationship with him if you don't want to. Having someone that's playing with your emotions and capable of telling you that he loves someone else when you're 5 months pregnant, with his child no less, isn't someone you need in your life.
Plenty of people have raised kids on their own. Tell him goodbye and good riddance.
Good luck.
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A
female
reader, Variety  +, writes (15 January 2008):
 It seems as if he is playing you both. He gets to live two lives and be two people: an expectant father and a boyfriend to another woman.
If you and him have been on and off for 8 years and she and him have already split up and got back together once it seems as if he is doing the same thing to her. Do you really want to spend the rest of your life with him being with you for a while and then going off to her for a while. And who knows...maybe more girls as time goes on.
It doesn't seem as if he is ready for commitment. But you have to think about you and your baby. Is this the sort of life you want for your child? Growing up with a daddy that sometimes lives with their mummy and sometimes doesn't?
You need to talk to him and tell you it isn't on. He can have one or the other. IF you want him that is. It is your choice too. Pregnancy is a scary thing to face alone but you shouldn't get back with him just because of that.
Hope this helps. Message me if you want to chat. x
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