A
female
age
30-35,
*uperhoopschick
writes:A little over a year ago I met this guy. We hit it off imediately. for 5months we could not b seperated, we either saw or called each other everyday. Then when i moved aa hour away from him to go to college we stayd in a long distance relationship. I caught him being with another girl and he says she jst strippd infrnt of him to ask his opinion on clothes..but she kept her bra n undies on..However I didnt know to believe it or not. since then him n me fought off and on for 4 more months. when our year aniversary came around we took a break for 2 weeks. he saw me everyday. then when i moved back in town, we broke it off completely. we didnt talk. We saw each other 3days a week for this whole summer and that was to play basketball. all we will do is stare each other down and not talk. then for 3 weeks i didnt go to bball this month. He text me with his new cell number, asking whats up and if i was willing to hangout as "friends" instead of "boyfriend and Girlfriend". I said yes..then when we hungout it went back to how we were b4 I left. Next time, Yesterday, I saw him..He wants to be friends with benefits. Yet he treats me like A girlfriends more than jst a friend or a friend with benefits. He says he has been with no girls since me. Should I allow my self to b a friend with benefits or make attempts to force on a new relationship with him. I think our onlyy problems is he mite hold grudes..Ive grown up past that but he hasnt really.
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a break, bra , friend with benefits, long distance, text Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, PsyCookie +, writes (17 August 2008):
 It was the part where the guy got a free striptease. I completely forgot that part.
And your advise was great too. I almost retracted what I said, but then I thought it would still apply to what you had said too.
And I wish she wouldn't get attached, but I'm afraid to agree with you. To fall for that kind of lie and still give him freebies must mean something's not right.
So please questioner, don't go for this guy. Or at least just remain friends with nothing more.
A
female
reader, PsyCookie +, writes (17 August 2008):
Whoops
Oldersister, you saw something I ignored. You just made a good point. A very good point
I still stand to my suggestion, though. But I will add that the questioner should watch out for herself.
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A
female
reader, PsyCookie +, writes (16 August 2008):
You're worried that he will get hurt for being FWB with you? Please clear that up.
If the above question applies to him, then you shouldn't worry. He has asked you to be your friends with benefits, so it's clear that he will not probably be hurt if you just leave him. He knows what he's getting into. Now, you sound like you're able to get into this without getting too attached, but I may be wrong.
What I suggest you to do is to not get into anything and play hard to get. Make him WISH he could have you. Flirt with him, tease him, but don't do anything with him. Tell him it's a relationship or noting with you and that you want to have him for the good and bad times, not just for the times he wants to get some. Don't force anything on him, but DO show off to him how good you are and what he could have if only he got into a relationship with him.
Don't let him have his cake. Make him wish he wants a cake.
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