A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Dear Cupid,It all started a few weeks ago. I started talking to this boy i knew back in school. I'm 26 now, he is 27.We went out for coffee on the first date, then a week later for coffee and lunch. He started getting extra attentive and we would be talking to each other all the time...he would call me the minute i got home and we would talk into the wee hours of the night.He would call me up and say stuff like " I wanna hold you" " I wanna kiss you" "You are so damn interesting"...he once asked me what i was willing to be for him and he said he would try his best to be with me.The calls got a bit sexual...since he would try to flirt outrageously with me.On the third date, he was supposed to come over after lunch to my place...mostly to buy some old stuff since i am shifting to a new place and also, he said he wanted to kiss me.During the date, he said he wanted to take a rain check on coming over since he was feeling 'scared'. I was upset, but i managed to get over with the lunch and not make things uncomfortable.Then i called him up later on in the day. He said he wasn't sure if he was entering into this for the right reasons, that he did not want to hurt me...that he wasn't ready.I asked him if he wanted me to stick around. But he said he could not ask me to do this since it was reasonable. I asked him if it was ok then if i moved on and started dating other men. He said he didn't know for sure.He had a bad relationship in the past...last year his gf dumped him and is now going to get married to someone else. He had told me he was over her but i am not sure.What should i do?- is it worth sticking around? he really didn't seem to care- how do i move on...to be frank, i feel a little humiliated...Please help me. I feel so sad.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (27 June 2013):
 I would not stick around.
delete his number and his email as well as blocking him on any social media you have
that's how you move on....
you did nothing wrong and have no reason to feel humiliated.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2013): No it's not worth sticking around.
OP why do you feel humiliated? You only had two dates and some messaging and then he changed his mind and called the situation off.
The only thing humiliating here is that you somehow asked him for permission to move on, and/or permission to wait for him.
Screw that, this is simply one of those things where it didn't work out, you found out quite early too so moving on will be easy enough but you do need to cut off contact with him.
No games OP, no permissions, just do what's right for you. This guy has nothing good to offer you and he very politely, and in a way was being good to you by realizing that and not taking advantage of your feelings for him. OP that is very rare, a lot of guys will just use you for sex, or keep seeing you even though they're not actually interested in you.
Don't get caught up in some bullshit emotional "will he/won't he?" crap with this guy. Then you'll truly have to feel the pain of total humiliation because you ignored the situation and kept pursuing him.
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A
female
reader, Brokenv  +, writes (27 June 2013):
I don't think you should right this guy off. But I also don't think you should be sitting at home waiting for him either.
Go out and date, if you want. Keep yourself busy. If he really wants you, he will come back and continue the relationship. I do respect the fact he was honest with you but you are not his ex-girlfriend. I think he may need to work through some issues. Give the space he may need now. You don't need to be the punching bag for him.
DON'T WAIT!
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