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female
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*eyla
writes: About 5 months ago I met a guy in my local pub. We always noticed each other over the course of a few months and I eventually plucked up the courage to speak to him egged on by a friend of his that I also know. I went onto a house party with him we got on well had a snog at the end of the night but he then told me had a girlfriend but was unhappy blah blah blah. I told him I wasn't interested in anything happening unless he was single and left it at that. We bumped into each other now and then and remained friends. One Staurday night I bumped into him in a club he made a beeline for me and told me his girlfriend was on holiday. We chatted all night and arranged to meet again as friends. At this next meeting he told me he was going to break up with his girlfriend as he wanted to be with me and began bombarding me with attention and calling day and night. I spoke to him but still maintained that nothing would happen until he was single. The following weekend he phoned me to tell me that he had broken up with her and came out with me that night. We slept together and everything seemed fantastic. The following week I found out that they hadn't broken up but his girlfriend had now found out he'd been with me and finished it. At this point he told me we needed to keep our relationship on the quiet until things blew over. During this time his girlfriend phoned me questioning me and told me he was calling her begging for a second chance. I asked him about it and he said it was her begging him. By the end of the week he called me saying that friends and family of hers were phoning him having a go and that everyone would hate us we tooed and froed about what to do. He reassured me that it was me that he loved and we would just face the music. By the next morning he had decided to go back to her.Now 5 months later they've broken up and he has told me he'd like to go for a drink but for now we should just be in touch. I can't work out if he likes me or not but would like a chance at a relationship with him. What should I do?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2006): no his name is glenn...still sounds the same..never know maybe he changed his name...ha ha ha...whatever the case i've known him a while and there's no changing some people...cant change the spots on a leopards back either. Seems some guys have no morals or concience for that matter...speaking from experience - any relationship that begins on the grounds of dishonesty ...tends to stay that way throughout the whole thing...i'd suggest u find someone without the 'baggage' and who is emotionally available to you exclusively..and above all one who isn't a lying cheating scumbag!! Another thing i thought of is to find out something about him you know is true...from a reliable source...something that runs along the same lines as his usual lies and test him out for one last go if u feel u need to prove it to yourself one last time...or even more twisted get a friend of yours he hasn't met to test him out on the 'cheaters' level...its not like your own friend is gonna lie to u!! in the end that would probably just prove your instincts about him to be completely right..and would only cause u uneccessary hurt..also a waste of energy..a good way for closure if u really need it ...he couldn't possibly lie his way out of that one!! and u get to walk away vurtually unskaved without the "what ifs" anyways ...good luck with your love life...i hope u dont make the same mistakes i did...(this one never got over his ex still to this day...she doesn't want him but he wont except it) WASTE OF YOUR TIME!!! keep away from game players and puppeteers (string-pullers) good luck !!
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female
reader, Leyla +, writes (14 February 2006):
Leyla is verified as being by the original poster of the questionIn response to anonymous - thanks for the great advice, I'm curious too as to whether its the same person his name is Richard, let me know if it is.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2006): sounds exactly like someone i know. It also sounds like he is playing you for a complete fool. If he's lied that many times so far, i would tend to believe his ex...if she really doesnt want him..what reason would she have to lie to you? Obviously he hasn't got a problem with lying to get what he wants ...what makes u think it would be any different for you? This mutual friend must have some idea who's chasing who and who the real liar is in it all! if you cant trust their opinion either...maybe speak to the ex sum more if shes not hostile she'd know more about him than you!...maybe even his other friends or parents! it seems pretty obvious to me he is still with this other girl to one degree or another...he's playing both of you as long as you let him!! Can u let me know his first name...I would just find it hysterical if it was the same person...and my advice then would be "get as far away from it as you can"...this one never changes!
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A
female
reader, Funky +, writes (13 February 2006):
I would take things very slowly here. It's obvious he has lied to you already, and lied to his long standing girlfriend, so what is going to change him now? If you just want a laugh and a few good nights out, then go with it. If, however, you are looking for a deep and meaningful relationship with this guy, you need to sit down and re-cap over the last few months. Put yourself in the ex's position, that wasn't your fault, but the next girl in the pub will react just as you did. Have a long think about why you want to be with him. Look around a little longer, there are some real nice guys out there.
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